A/N: After so long, I FINALLY got ideas for this fic. To y'all who've stuck around during the time I've been d3@d here and are still sticking around, tysm! This is also a late B-DAY gift for my 'lil bro. :)
"Bai, sestwa!" A 5-year-old Krus as a 7-year-old Matrona took off her seatbelt and hopped off the car.
Matrona giggled. "Bye, brat!"
"I stiw don't wike you, but bai!"
Matrona's eyes twitched. "Geez. Love ya too."
***
An 8-year-old Matrona extended her arms out. "I washed your butt and changed your clothes, now please give me a PROPER hug, brat."
"Okay!" The 6-year-old Krus immediately POUNCED on his sister.
"No- Krusy- please *cough* I'm your sis- *cough* I'm your sister! You- *cough* You can't k!ll me; my *cough* my life can't *cough* it can't end like this..."
"Krusveto Lvrenskiovich Dorokhov, GET OFF YOUR SISTER RIGHT NOW!"
"But mom-"
"OFF YOUR SISTER, YOUNG MAN."
"UGH! Fine."
***
"I made this for you, sestra." A 7-year-old Krus said, giving a childishly, hilariously, unrealistic drawing of a 9-year-old Matrona.
"Aww! So you do like me-"
"No."
"MAMACHKA! BRAT SAID HE HATES ME!"
***
"What do you think of this outfit for me on my 11th birthday in 7 months?" A 10-year-old Matrona asked, bursting through the door of the 8-year-old Krus' room. She was wearing a pastel pink dress, black leggings, and cute, hot pink flats with fluffy pom poms on it.
Krus responded with a thumbs up and an angered Matrona began looking for a hairbrush to smack her brother with.
***
An 11-year-old Matrona and a 9-year-old Krus laughed at the funny video they had just saw on TV.
"Do you like me now?" Matrona asked.
"No." Matrona pouted and gave him a smack.
***
The 12-year-old Matrona and the 10-year-old Krus had been grounded by their parents an hour ago.
"I can't believe you got us into trouble." Krus gave his sister a (not so gentle) smack.
"You're the one who started it!" Matrona countered, smacking him back.
"You're insufferable!"
"Your immature and childish AF!"
"We're both children; of course we're still childish!"
"Even so, YOU KNEW BETTER!"
"SO DID YOU!"
The two siblings were silent for a few seconds as they gave each other death glares, before immediately engaging in a slap fight.
***
The 13-year-old Matrona was giggling her butt off about something.
"What are you laughing about?" Her mother, a Caucasian woman with naturally lavender hair with blonde streaks named Skurava, asked.
"I forgot!" Matrona said in between laughs.
"How could you have forgotten?" Skurava asked incredulously.
"I don't get you at all." The 11-year-old Krus said in disbelief.
"But you love me."
"No."
"Fine. You at least like me."
"I don't."
"You smiled when you bid me goodbye when I left for school earlier! That proves you do like me!"
"I did not smile."
"Yes you did!"
"I did not!"
"Did too!"
"Did not!"
"Did too!"
The sound of the door opening and a male voice was heard. "I'm home!"
"Papachka!" Skurava laughed as the kids ran to greet their dad before following after them.
***
"Hurry the feck up, M!" A 12-year-old Krus yelled.
The 14-year-old Matrona yelled back, which could be heard even if her bedroom was on the 4th floor and Krus was sitting on the dining table in the living room at the moment. "NUMBER ONE, WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE, KD! NUMBER TWO, LET A GAL TAKE HER TIME IN GETTING READY, WILL YA?!?!?!"
"Why do you wear makeup when you go out?! It's completely unnecessary!"
"Why do you like Spider man?!"
"..."
"Thought so."
"F you!"
"LANGUAGE!"
***
16-year-olds Vinskov and Vinskolla's eyes widened as they walked in and saw a 15-year-old Matrona giving a 13-year-old Krus a horribly done haircut.
"What in the actual fu-" Vinskov was cut off by Vinskolla.
"What's happening?"
"I know it was stupid of me to agree to do it, but Krus wanted me to cut his hair for picture day tomorrow." Matrona answered.
Krus denied the allegations. "SHE wanted to do this. Not me."
Matrona asked. "You ASKED me to do it, which goes to show that you DO like-"
"I do not."
Vinskolla facepalmed. "A bowl cut is WAY too grade-schooler for Krus and not suitable for picture day. Also, our parents are coming home in 10 minutes."
Krus and Matrona's hearts dropped and they looked at each other. "What are we gonna do?"
***
A 14-year-old Krus pat the crying, 16-year-old Matrona's back and gave her a tissue to wipe her tears. "You good?"
Matrona sniffled. "Yeah. Do you like me? Is that why you're comforting me now?"
"No. I just hate seeing you cry, but I still don't like you."
Matrona let out a laugh and a sob as she hugged her younger brother. "Whatever floats your boat, brat."
Krus rolled his eyes.
***
Flash forward to 4 years later, Vinskolla and Vinskov, now 19, watched as Matrona and Krus, now 18 and 16, fought.
"This is the 5th time this week." Vinskov muttered.
"Siblings by chance, frenemies by choice." Vinskolla mused.
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The CRAZEE Cousin Squad
FanfictionMy first attempt at crack/comedy. A family comedy/romcom about a 16-year-old Krus who has skipped a grade or two and is now in college and his shenanigans with his three roommates; his 18-year-old sister; Matrona Dorokhova and his 19-year-old matern...
