This Beautiful World - Book #1 (BxB)

Chapter 36

For the next few days, I didn't spend much time with either Arin or Alex. I was trying to make an effort to join the others and not stay trapped inside my room all day. When I attempted to speak to Alex, he avoided me like the plague. He still wasn't willing to talk to me after that day. 

As for Arin, he kept making excuses that he was busy. I knew that he was when it came to helping out everyone here, but he wasn't busy all of the time. We were stuck inside this building all day and most of the time we had nothing to do. He had moments to spare, but he was choosing not to. I was starting to think that perhaps he wasn't serious about a relationship with me. Perhaps he changed his mind but was too reluctant to tell me. 

Caitlyn took the seat next to me. I was sitting downstairs, staring out of the window. I was doing as I was asked and staying downstairs among other people, but this was the first time that someone decided to join me today. Alex had been hanging around Xavier all day, and I could hear those two bickering back and forth. Arin decided to hang out with his other friends. They were both leaving me alone. It bothered the hell out of me, but I would give them their space. 

My sister glanced at me and must have seen the annoyed look on my face. She asked, "Boy trouble?"

I rolled my eyes. "Am I making it that obvious?"

"Well, I can see that something is wrong. Alex hasn't been talking to you since the other day when Arin left your room, he hasn't been speaking to you either. As your sister, I tend to notice when something is wrong with you. Do you wanna talk about it?" she offered. 

I wasn't sure if this was something that I wanted to speak about with my sister. Sure, Caitlyn may have been a good listener, but I didn't know if she could actually give me advice. She was young and naive when it came to relationships. But I guess that I was naive as well, seeing how I'd never been in one before. I didn't know if this was normal or not. 

I sighed and gave her a quick rundown. "Alex is mad at me because I chose Arin over him, but Alex never cared before so I don't get what the big deal is. And Arin won't talk to me, because I don't fucking know why. I think that he's changed his mind and doesn't want to tell me. We want two different things. He wants to take it slow, while I think that there's no time for that."

"Alex is clearly jealous. He'll get over it eventually, but I think he might be taking it hard because of everything that's happened. You both lost a very close friend, so perhaps Alex is feeling as though he might lose you, too. If you think about it, you're the last person here that he's friends with. Sure, he's been hanging around Xavier a lot recently, but this is a new development. Knowing Alex, I doubt that he'll easily let himself become attached. As for Arin, I think that you need to just talk to him. Go up to him right now and tell him that you have to speak with him. He's not going to deny you," Caitlyn said. 

Thinking about going up to Arin now made me feel a bit nervous. It was a conversation that needed to be had, but I was afraid that he was going to reject me. When Caitlyn saw me hesitating, she stood up, grabbed my arm, and pulled me to my feet.

"I'm just going to force a conversation between you two if I have to," she said as she began to drag me over to Arin, Tyler, and Stella. Once she reached them, my sister had no issue interrupting their conversation. "Arin, my brother needs to speak with you. Alone. Now."

He seemed taken aback by how forceful her demand was. He slowly nodded, stood up, and said to me, "Come with me." 

Caitlyn let go of my arm and pushed me towards Arin. Just as Caitlyn said, she was forcing this conversation to happen. I had a feeling that if either of us tried to back out of it now, then she wouldn't let that happen. She would make us speak now in front of everyone if she had to. So instead of trying to get out of this situation, I did as I was told and followed Arin. 

He took me to the rooftop, where we were completely alone. He didn't turn to face me, but instead, he walked towards the railing, leaning up against it. I joined him. There wasn't much to see as we looked out towards the town. It was quiet, with no sign of movement. By now, I probably should have been used to how lifeless this place had become, but it still felt strange. This was my home for my entire life. 

Arin eventually broke the silence between us. "I already know what this is about. I'm not having second thoughts about us if that's what you think."

"Then why have you been avoiding me? If you're serious about me, then we should be spending this time together. You've even mentioned before that there's a chance that we can die because of this virus. With that possibility hanging over our heads, we should be enjoying what time we have and not taking it slow as you suggested. There's no time to go slow," I finally said my fear out loud. He knew that what I said was true. We could die at any moment, and that reality was finally sinking in for me. 

"I just don't want you to make a mistake . . ." he started to say, but I cut him off. 

"Stop saying that! You're not going to be a mistake to me." Arin opened his mouth to say something, but I wasn't finished. "Don't say anything about Alex. I already made my choice to be with you and I'm not changing my mind because of a stupid crush that I used to have. I want to be with you. No one else."

"Aiden . . ." He glanced away. "The thing that I am worried about is one of us dying, not Alex. You recently felt loss, and I don't want you to go through that again anytime soon. You have your family and Alex left. If you add me to that list of people that you care about, then that's one more person you can potentially lose. I don't want to be the cause of your pain."

"We can worry about that if the time comes. The future is uncertain, so I want to take this chance now while I can." I hugged him, burying my face in his chest. "So stop avoiding me, please."

Gently, he put his arms around me and kissed the top of my head. "Okay, I'm sorry. I promise I won't avoid you anymore. I did say that I would be here for you whenever you need me, after all."

I was relieved that he wasn't going to reject me. I was beginning to like Arin a lot. Spending what little time I could with him was starting to become the only thing making this place bearable.