This Beautiful World - Book #1 (BxB)

Chapter 39

As the days passed, I started to believe that seeing Riley had only been a dream. That night when I saw her, after returning with Alex, I told them about my interaction with her. They were skeptical, and for good reason. Arin also knew that Riley was dead. He was there when the incident happened, so he knew as well as I did that she was no longer with us. But if it was her, this opened up many more questions and issues. 

Meeting Riley could mean that the zombies could imitate the humans they once were. This meant it would be hard to discern who was a zombie and who was human. But since I was the one who saw her, even if I didn't know any better, I would be able to tell that something was wrong. She still had those black marks on her body from when she was about to turn. She also didn't seem like she wanted to hurt me. Riley left because she could feel herself changing. There was still some of her humanity left. 

While that may have been the case for Riley, that didn't mean that there wouldn't be others who could be trusted. Other 'intelligent' zombies could use this tactic to make the humans fall for their trick. It would be easy for them to devour their targets if they played their cards right. This was a scary thought. How could we survive if we couldn't even tell who was a zombie? 

I sat alone, staring out the window with my knees up to my chest. It was hard for me to process everything that had been happening. I was the only one there that night, so there was a chance that it was all in my head. I was seeing what I wanted to believe. 

I didn't look up when I felt someone sit down on the bench next to me. I knew it was Arin the moment that he wrapped an arm around my shoulder. He gently rubbed up and down in an attempt to comfort me. It was working as I finally leaned into his embrace. I couldn't deny that his affection worked on me. Even if I wanted to be alone, I also wanted him by my side. I could do without everyone else's company. 

"Aiden, are you okay?" he asked. 

No, I wasn't. But he already knew that. There was no point reiterating everything that he already knew. I knew that he only wanted to check up on me. He cared about me, and I wanted to embrace that for as long as possible. This wasn't going to last forever. 

"To be completely honest, I'm starting to feel suffocated here. I want to go home." Being stuck inside this apartment complex was getting to me. I felt like I was beginning to go insane, and perhaps that was why I was starting to imagine things. Riley was never here that night. I must have made it up due to going stir-crazy.

I thought that Arin would deny my request. I knew how dangerous it would be to venture outside. Going out there just so that I could see my home again was a stupid idea, but he surprised me when he said, "Let's go. I'll take you there."

I finally glanced over to meet his eyes. "Do you mean it?"

"If it'll help you feel better, then I'm willing to do anything for you. Besides, I think that I need a change of scenery as well. But, if we notice it's too dangerous, then we have to turn back," Arin said.

I was ecstatic hearing these words, but it also made me nervous. I haven't seen my home since going away to college. I didn't know if there would be any damage because of the zombie outbreak. We could be going there for nothing. I was also well aware that my selfish desires were beginning to take over again. If we did this, then I would be putting our lives in danger. 

I was about to say that I changed my mind, but then Arin stood up and held his hand out for me to take. I should have backed out, but instead, I grabbed his hand and let him help me to my feet. If we went to my house, then I hoped that it would help me clear my mind. I feared that this could be a waste of time. 

He must have seen my reluctance. "Don't worry. I'll be there to protect you, I promise. Nothing is going to happen to us. Just have faith in that."

I wanted to believe in his words. More than anything, I needed to get out of this place right now. If I returned home, then perhaps my mind could be at peace for a short time. This could be my last chance to return there. The future was uncertain, so I wanted to see my home again before it was too late. 

I knew that the others wouldn't be too happy about us leaving. Instead of leaving for something productive or supplies, we were leaving just so that I could clear my head. It was reckless and I knew that if we told the others, then they might try to stop us. Alex would certainly have something to say about it, as well as my mother. If we wanted to leave, we would have to do it in secret. 

Arin kept a hold of my hand as he led me to the front door. We always had our supplies already prepared in case we ever needed to venture out. He grabbed one of the backpacks that was sitting beside the door. It would contain weapons as well as food in case we got stranded somewhere. I suspected that we wouldn't be gone for too long. We would return here once I was feeling a little better. 

He glanced back to make sure that no one was watching us. When the coast seemed to be clear, Arin opened the front door and took me outside. Leaving without telling anyone was probably one of the stupidest things that either of us have ever done. Arin was supposed to be the responsible one, yet he was doing something this dumb because of me. It made me feel like a bad influence on him, but he didn't seem to mind as we walked down the silent streets. 

Since he didn't know where my home was located, I had to take the lead. My home was a few blocks away from Riley's house, which made my heart ache. I didn't want to think about her or her family right now. Ever since returning to our small town, her family had fallen apart. First her mother, then Riley herself. After Riley's death, her father left the apartment building. He decided to face the world on his own, most likely to face his death as well. The thought filled me with an unbearable sadness. I was learning that loss was inevitable, but that didn't mean it any easier. 

I was surprised by the lack of zombies that we had seen recently. It made the town seem as though it was abandoned for another reason and not because the undead invaded. I wished that there was another reason for this disaster. Most people that I knew and grew up with were now dead because of this virus. 

Before long, my house came into view. Seeing it again almost brought tears to my eyes. I had many memories of this place, plenty that I didn't want to forget. I quickened my pace until I reached the front porch. From the looks of the outside, it didn't seem as though my home had been damaged. My mother and Caitlyn must have fled when they saw the disaster that was happening outside. It made me glad that they were able to find Xavier and his group as quickly as they did. I didn't want to think about what could have happened to them otherwise. 

I pushed the front door open and walked inside. The only light came from the windows, and even though it was mostly dark, this place still looked the same as I remembered. Arin shut the door behind him, cautious of being in a new place. He was on guard as he should be. Even though this was my home, that didn't mean that I could relax just yet. Not until we knew that we were completely alone. 

As we walked through the home looking for any sign of invaders, I couldn't help glancing at the photos that I walked by. My mom always kept pictures of our family hung up all around the house, some of them even containing my father. Despite everything that happened between them, she still kept all of his pictures hung up. It was a reminder of better times, as my mom would always say. I may have been angry at him for leaving us, but now that I was seeing his face again in these pictures, I did hope that he was safe. 

When it seemed as though everything was safe in my house, I finally felt like I could take a breather. The emptiness did feel strange to me, though. It was a reminder that things would never be the same again. 

I glanced back at Arin and gave him a sad smile. "Care to go upstairs to my room with me?"

I wanted to lie down on my bed again and just relax. I had been getting rest back at the apartments, but that couldn't beat being able to be in my own room again. Arin would be my first boyfriend to ever be in my room. That thought made me nervous, but also excited at the same time. 

This time, I held out my hand for him to take.