𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒍𝒂𝒓 𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆 || baxter radic (discontinued)

9.

𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒍𝒂'𝒔 𝒑𝒐𝒗

I don't know what's taken over my body, but I feel like I'm not inside of it. It's probably the lack of sleep—or maybe even the hypnotic scent that Josh has decided to wear today. Whatever it is, I've become half of myself, letting all my hidden secrets show. The biggest one being maybe, just maybe, there might be an inkling of a crush on Josh Macqueen himself.

I don't expect him to babysit me like a child, but he does. He lets me rest my head on his lap as I drift off to sleep. I don't know how long I've been out. When I wake I find him asleep as well. His phone was clearly not enough distraction. I'm sorry that I've made your set day boring Sir, I will not make it up to you.

The loss of the warmth of my body causes him to wake. He stretches, almost whacking me in the side of the head. I have to duck and weave out of his way. I'll take it as payback for all the torture I've put him through. An attempted hit was all the payback he would get.

"Morning Sugar Pie." I bop his nose before raising off the couch to look in the mirror. When I see my reflection I almost scream. I'm a horrifying sight, as I normally am. I should have warned him he'd wake up with an Edward Scissorhands look alike in his lap.

"Remind me to never agree to this again." He attempts to crack his back, but by the look on his face its unsuccessful. That's what you get for treating me kindly. I never agreed to appease him with a comfortable place to stay. He offered to escort me, and then insisted on staying. Tired Stella never fights off a good pillow person.

"You practically begged me to let you stay. You couldn't let my 'pretty face' wake up alone in this lonely trailer." I run a brush through my hair, looking over my shoulder as I restate his comments from earlier.

"You were acting cute. You weren't hating me alright? Let a man live a little will you?" I watch as Josh stands, my eyes tracing the lines of his body as he walks over to me.

"Man?" My eyes jump to meet his. Have I forgotten to mention, I'm a bit delirious most the time when I wake? I'm either the most awful person or a basket full of flirty tones. Seemed like the flirty side wanted to escape.

"Do you think I'm not a man?" He leans over, resting his hands against the back of my chair. "Do I need to prove it to you?"

I stand quickly, making him step back away from me. "I know that you have a dick if that's what you're asking." I give him a nice ball tap and watch as he drops to the floor. Or maybe it's the awful side making an appearance.

"What the fuck!" He yells at me, holding his crotch in pain.

I squat down next to him, running my hand over his cheek, "that's what you get for trying to make back handed sexual comments at me. Will you ever learn Josh?"

"You are literally the worst." He groans.

"Says the man obsessed with me." I stand and walk toward the door. "Don't worry, you can stay as long as you like. Snoop all you want. You'll find nothing Sugar Pie." I exit my trailer and head off to grab food.

It takes Josh a good thirty minutes to catch up with me. When he does he's shooting daggers through my chest. If they were real I'm sure I'd be a dead woman on the spot.

"You guys want to know something embarrassing?" Josh sits down at a table next to half of our costars. We're all sat eating with a plate of food, everyone except him. "Stella, she likes to confess things in her sleep."

My eyes widen. "I do not!" My defensive tone doesn't help rest my case. I only look guiltier the more I try to deny everything that he says. I should really learn my lesson. Whatever I do to try and earn a bit of payback on him, he'll come back a million times harder. I still had no idea why my best friend thought he liked me. He just liked to push my buttons, that was it.

"She likes me." He mouths, pointing toward me. He could have just said it aloud. We can all read his lips.

"I do not." I glare at him. "He's annoying."

"You were using him as a pillow earlier. We all think you might like him just a little." Sky pokes the sleeping bear. "I mean why else would you pretend to hate him all this time?"

"I'm not pretending." I run my hands down my face in frustration.

"It's okay Buttercup," Josh leans over the table to get a better look at me, "I heard it straight from your mouth. If you want to deny it, more power to you. But I know the real truth." He smirks.

"There's nothing wrong with liking a costar." Savannah, who plays Bodhi, chimes in.

"You know what?" I stand, pressing my hands off the table in annoyance. "I like Josh. There." I throw my hands up. "We can all move on now." I grab my lunch off the table and storm off away from everyone.

Sure, I was being a bit dramatic. But it's something that I have had to deal with constantly for weeks. Sometimes it gets to be too much. I just wanted the talking to stop. My actions from earlier in the day didn't help my case at all either. It was easier to put everyone to rest, even if I wasn't fully convinced that I liked this annoying man. Taking the easier way out just seemed like the best option.

"Stell!" Josh chases after me, I can hear my name being called from quite a way away. I stop my feet and turn toward him, knowing he won't give up if I try to avoid him. "I didn't mean to upset you." He says as he approaches.

"That's all you ever do. Constantly pushing my buttons. So fine, maybe I like you a hair, but that's it. Are you happy?" The attitude in my tone is evident, and Josh doesn't like it at all.

"No, I'm not. I've done nothing to you Stella. You waltzed in here from day one with an attitude toward me. I've done everything I can to make this transition easy for you. You've been nothing but a spoiled brat about it. So yeah, I'm pushing your buttons a little, but I think it's well deserved after the way you've treated me." He huffs clear frustration radiating through him. I can tell by the way he's clenching his fists together at his sides.

I step toward him, wrapping my hands over his clenched fists. "I put up walls because if I don't... my attachment issues will become everyone else's problems."

"Don't go soft like you care." Josh's eyes darken.

"If I fall for you and things don't work and we end up in season four together, what the hell do you thinks going to happen Josh? Hell, that's what will happen. This arguing we have now, will be unbearable."

"Just shut up, will you?" Josh pulls his hands quickly from mine, cupping them around my cheeks as he presses his lips to mine.