Born To Die | Vanessa Afton

12

You woke up as usual, quite early, walking into the front room, Vanessa was sleeping still, you concluded that she must have had a rough night for her to sleep for that long. You had caught yourself smiling in a minute before it had turned to a small frown. You had hoped that she didn't need to do anything today (obviously other than going to work) because you hadn't even asked her if it was okay if she stayed. The thought crossed your mind that she might have resisted falling asleep if she didn't want to but then again, it was very stressful yesterday.

Obviously in your thoughts, you had grabbed a glass and it had ended up falling out of your hand. In a terrible attempt to try to stop it smashing, you put your hand forward. In your tired state, the glass smashed on your counter, glass shards literally flying everywhere. Swearing under your breath as you saw some glass scratched your hand, you looked around to see the glass also on the floor. This was the last thing you needed today.

"Hey... Are you alright?" A quiet and quite raspy voice said from the other room. Your house was extremely small so the front room could be seen from the kitchen and at this point, you could see Vanessa. Her hair was messy and she was clearly tired but she still seemed beautiful in your eyes, you chuckled lightly, grabbing some kitchen towel and trying to dab the blood away. You were sort of shocked how much blood there was from a tiny cut.

"Yeah." You finally said, quite shallowly, you didn't know what else to say. Stepping carefully away from the glass, you sighed, keeping in as much frustration as you could, this was not an ideal situation. Vanessa found her way over to you, looking over at the glass first. You must have woken her up with the sound. You felt almost as if you had something to apologise for. "Just... made a bit of a mess."

"Are you bleeding?" Vanessa asked, her expression changed to one of concern as her hand took over your bleeding hand.

"It's just a scratch." You had muttered and her eyes narrowed at you as she took the paper towel and lifted it to reveal a little more than a scratch. She didn't seem that bothered over the blood while you had gotten a little bit queasy just by looking at it. "Did I wake you up?" You whispered, wincing when she had pressed a little too hard.

"Yes, but I had to get up at some point, and it's good that I did. Do you have any bandages?" Vanessa had asked, looking up to you for the first time. It had made you nervous. Why did it make you nervous? You cleared your throat.

"Yes. third cupboard on the right." You said. Vanessa nodded, pushing the paper towel back on the cut, the bleeding had slowed down now but you still held it as she found her way to the cupboard. If you were alone and this happened, you would have let it stop bleeding and wouldn't wrap it up at all. You always felt as if you were overacting, that was what you were taught, if anything happened when you were a child, your mother would just shrug it off.

That in itself didn't seem that bad. You remembered an incident where you had literally been pushed over and had no time to react as a teenager, around fourteen. Going home crying, you had blood spilling down your arm and a massive gash where it had collided with a rock. Your mother had laughed at you and said you were overacting. You had gone to your friends house, knowing her mum would have bandages and everything because she was a nurse.

Vanessa took a hold of your hand again, placing the bandage directly on it at first and wrapping it up carefully. She secured it and looked at the glass that was all over the floor. You were quick to speak up, clearing your throat. "I can clear this all up... Thank you for this." You said, Vanessa slowly nodded as you began trying to put the glass in a corner.

"Are you feeling better after yesterday?" She had asked as you finished clearing up the glass. You looked to her for a moment and a sympathetic look spread over her face as she asked. You shrugged, not really knowing the answer to that yourself.

"I honestly don't know. I feel like I don't know who I'd be without this job. I would literally have nothing if I was fired." You said, gulping as if you weren't telling the truth. You were but you were so used to just lying to everyone you know or giving vague answers that opening up felt weird, especially to Vanessa, who was technically your supervisor. However, these past weeks, she has felt less like a supervisor and more like a friend. Well, on your behalf anyway. You reached up into a cupboard. "Coffee?"

"Yes... please." She said and you pulled out two mugs. Vanessa had fell silent, you knew she probably had another outlook. She seemed so positive, you physically didn't know how she stayed like this all the time, well seemingly all the time. You knew that there was a lot that you didn't know about her. She definitely knew more about you than you did about her. You talked and she listened. "If I got fired, I'd try a different career, see if something else suited me."

"I'm thinking of going to one of those... career councillors." You suddenly said. It did link to what Vanessa had said to an extent but not entirely. You poured the coffee in a mug and passed it to her, also passing her the sugar, just in case she wanted some. She looked up to you, but you had already turned around to grab some kind of snack, you weren't that hungry for breakfast, yo

"No... I don't think that would be a good idea." She said a little too fast for your liking, your face scrunched up in confusion as you turned to look at her semi-scared expression. She took a sip of her coffee carefully, you had just poured it so it was clear that it was going to be hot. Silence filled the room as you looked at her for an explanation. As she made eye contact with you, you raised an eyebrow, she sighed. "I just mean that they are no good. Its a waste of time and money."

You just nodded, not convinced by what she was saying but was it any of your business anyway? She might just have had a terrible experience with the one that was in this town. You both drunk your coffees in silence before Vanessa had looked at the time, her eyes widened a little. "I have to go home before work. I'll pick you up at 6?" She seemed to be rushing. Maybe you were right, she had to do something.

"Yeah." You had said as she gathered her stuff.

"Thank you for all this, like not just kicking me out when I had fell asleep." She said, and in a flash, she had given you a quick side hug before leaving. You stood there just confused about what had just happened, you weren't too disheartened, you got to see her in eight hours anyway.