Renaissance (Cillian Murphy x Reader)

Part 11

You finally found another apartment, you didn't love it but it would have to work for a few months. It was a studio a street away from your university so you could literally fall from bed and be in class in less than five minutes, and it was cheaper than all the other options. But the building was old and the stairs smelled a bit like pee.

Now you were in your empty apartment, waiting for the landlord to return the keys. It made you a little sad to see the apartment devoid of your things, as if you no longer recognized it as yours. For the past two days, you had packed all of your items and memories created over the previous three years into boxes, and had taken them to the new studio. Cillian offered to help you carry everything in his car, although you didn't have that much stuff either.

After giving the keys to the landlord, you turned around and silently said goodbye to the apartment. Then you walked to the center of the city, where you lived from now on.

The cold wind hurt your cheeks but the walk felt good to clear your mind. You had planned to spend the rest of the evening with Olivia and Valerie, so they could see your new place. They were waiting at one of the doors of the university when you saw them, from a distance you waved at them and they waved back. You could see Olivia jumping up and down with excitement. Once you got to them, you hugged each other, as you always did.

"Have you been waiting a long time?"

"Not really," said Valerie, as she put her hands inside the pockets of her coat, "but let's go, it's cold here."

"How far is it?" wondered Olivia, intertwining her arm with yours.

"Not far at all, right on that street", you pointed to the building and motioned them to walk in said direction.

After a small house tour, since it was a studio there was not much to show, you all decided to order takeout. When the delivery guy rang the bell, you quickly played rock-paper-scissors and ended up losing, so it was your turn to go down to the door to pick up the order. You climbed the stairs to the second floor slowly, despite the unpleasant smell. Unfortunately, that was your new reality, so you might as well start getting used to it.

When you entered your house again you saw your friends whispering in front of the wall where you had placed the photographs and postcards. You left the bag on the table in front of the couch and glanced at them out of the corner of your eye as you went to the small kitchen area to get glasses and napkins.

"Dinner is ready", you hummed.

"Who is this?" Asked Valerie.

You looked at her completely lost, not knowing who she was referring to. "Who?"

Then you realised what she meant. She was holding a polaroid in her hand and you didn't need to look further to know that it was Cillian's photograph. You felt your heart racing in your chest and an unpleasant feeling spreading through the palm of your hands. With two long strides, you reached Valerie and took the photograph from her hand.

"It's nobody", you said quickly while Valerie stared at you with a questioning look.

Beside her, Olivia tried to suppress a smile.

"Are you fucking him?" asked Val, grabbing your arm. "Does he go to your class?"

"No!" You hissed. This wasn't how you wanted your friends to find out about you and Cillian.

A series of images began to flash before your eyes, from your friends judging you for dating an older man who was also your teacher, to Cillian losing his job because of you, or you being expelled from the university.

"Why don't we have dinner and leave this conversation for another time?", suggested Olivia, noticing your distress.

"If she has a boyfriend we have the right to know, we are her friends", complained Valerie. This bothered you, so you snapped at her.

"It took you two years to tell us that you were dating Tom, you always want to know everything and you never tell us anything in return when we ask, so don't come with excuses now."

Valerie put a hand on her chest, looking offended. "I notice a certain tone of acrimony towards me and I don't like it at all, Y/N."

Olivia stood between you two, trying to calm things down. "Dinner is going to get cold."

You shook your head, feeling tears forming in your eyes. You didn't like arguing, much less with your friends.

"It's not that, Valerie. I'm tired of you always digging for information. You always do the same thing, like when you make comments as if you were superior for studying a science degree instead of art. Don't you realise that the things you say hurt others?" You were telling her what you had kept inside for years, but once you started you couldn't stop. "And let me tell you one more thing, it hurt me a lot when you left me alone at the welcome party, and when you told me to stop being dramatic. A good friend does not leave another abandoned at a party, at least you could have texted me telling me that you were going home."

After a pause, Valerie grabbed her coat and walked towards the door.

"Where are you going?"

She turned around, avoiding looking at you at all costs. "I don't feel like I'm welcome here, I've heard enough so I'm leaving."

And with that, Valerie left slamming the door. Her footsteps echoed as she descended the stairs. You turned to Olivia, who had sat on the couch and was enjoying the food.

"Do you think I've gone too far with what I said?"

She shrugged and swallowed before speaking. "I think you've had a lot of accumulated stress for a few weeks now and you haven't been able to hold it in any longer. You told her the truth and she left because he didn't like hearing it." Oli patted the couch next to her for you to sit down.

After dinner you stayed on the couch for a while watching a dating show on TV and commenting on the participants. Olivia caressed your wrist to get your attention.

"Y/N, the guy in the polaroid looks like your teacher. The one we saw in the restaurant that time. It's him, right?"

You sighed and nodded. "His name is Cillian," you admitted softly. Your friend hummed in response and bit her lip.

"I don't know if I should tell you or if it's important to you, but Brad texted me the other day." You met her eyes listening to what she had to say. "He asked me if you were dating anyone."

"And what did you tell him?"

She wrinkled her nose and rolled her eyes. "I told him to ask you himself. He also said that he saw you kissing someone in a car, or something like that."

"Didn't he tell you who I was kissing?", you asked under your breath.

"No," she shook her head, "but now I get an idea of who could be."

You didn't try to deny it, Olivia wasn't stupid. The two of you remained silent until the TV program ended and she prepared to leave. Your friend wrapped you in a tight hug that caught you off guard. "Don't worry, Y/N. Just be careful and have fun, if you need to talk, call or text me."

"Sure, thanks Oli."

She smiled. "Also, next time you want to argue with Valerie, make sure I'm not there, okay?"

After tidying up a bit you went to bed although you were having a hard time falling asleep. You couldn't stop thinking. Years ago, when you were still in high school, you all got along really well. Including Brad, Valerie and Olivia as well as others who went to study in other cities.

It was hard to admit that in the span of a couple of months you had lost two of your oldest friends but maybe it was meant to happen one way or another. Likewise, your thing with Cillian couldn't remain hidden forever.