The Kids are Fine | Kellic (boyxboy)

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN | One. Two. Three. Pause.

KELLIN'S P.O.V

My eyes flutter open.

I yawn and stretch, my hands going out in front of me. I feel an instant headache, even though I was fully surrounded by the darkness of my room.

My clothes feel too tight as I slowly become aware that I'm still wearing jeans. Jesus, what the fuck? I try to roll over, but something keeps me from moving. I feel disoriented in the blackness; my breathing hitches as I feel myself start to panic.

My eyes widen and I look down at myself, even though my eyes haven't adjusted to the dark yet. I feel an arm tighten around my waist and claustrophobia threatens to creep in.

"Wha-" I whisper.

Something- someone holds me tight- still- close. My eyes widen and then all at once, everything comes flooding back to me. The party, the amount of alcohol I consumed, Alyssa, Jordan, trying to drive, and...

And Vic.

He brought me home.

He stayed.

I slowly relax, letting out a breath I didn't know I had been holding in. Vic stirs, if only a little. I feel his hand on my stomach, against my skin, where my shirt had ridden up in my sleep. Slowly, a picture in my head creeps in of him crawling into bed with me.
But I couldn't remember if he had put his arm around me before I fell asleep.

I listen closely and I can hear him breathe. I can feel his nose buried in my hair at the back of my head. He nuzzles against me while I just listen. I close my eyes, enjoying the feeling. Any panic I had felt a second ago about the close proximity of some stranger had completely vanished when I realized it was Vic.

And then suddenly, some part of me wonders if he would hold me like this if i hadn't been upset. If I hadn't called him in a panic. If I hadn't been too unsteady to make it up the stairs by myself. If he were awake. If he would hold me like this just because.

His hand is warm against the bareness of my stomach. Goosebumps rise to the surface of my skin and I shiver.

I didn't mind the touch. Something told me it was actually his touch that I didn't mind. Then again, another thing told me that maybe it wasn't necessarily the touch itself that I didn't mind. But him. I didn't mind him.

It's still a strange thought. No matter how many times I've had it. And I have had it quite a few times. That I didn't mind him, or anything he did for me... or to me. Something tells me I'd let him to anything to me. That's also a strange thought I've had a dozen times. But it's one that I had pushed away every time it made itself known in my brain. It's a thought that's been nagging at me since we kissed in my lounge.

I let the thought simmer, unlike every other time I've had it. It doesn't scream at me or demand me to acknowledge it like I thought it would. It simply sits, calmly and quietly in a hidden corner. Comfortable and content as if it belonged in that part of my brain.

As if it's always been there.

The idea that feeling like this about a boy... had always been there. I had just never noticed it before.

It's like kissing Vic... feeling things for Vic... it woke up that part of my brain that had always been there, hidden in the dark. And here came Vic with a flashlight, confusing the hell out of me. But at the same time, making everything make sense. Fall into place.

Another snippet takes the stage in my mind. I kissed him when he brought me home. He pushed me away.

I kissed him and he didn't want me to.