Kingsman: The Devil's Gamble

Chapter Five

It didn't take too terribly long for Whiskey and I to get there, despite the heavy traffic that tried to make it harder on us. With all the stupid jackasses that roam around Cleveland, I am genuinely surprised that there were no outrageous road rage incidents that got too out of hand. If anything of that sort did happen, then Whiskey and I would have no choice but to interfere...and quite frankly, we didn't want to do that unless it was absolutely necessary.

Plus, it's a huge mood-killer.

Had Whiskey and I been forced to intervene in a road-rage incident, then we most likely wouldn't be in the same mood for the rest of the day. That's why we tend not to intervene unless absolutely necessary. For example, if anything got physical, we would try to play peacemaker. Well...I'd be the one to get in there and try to break it up and maybe get caught up in the fight myself. According to Whiskey, I'm a bit "unhinged", which means that I'm bound to do some crazy shit.

But luckily, there were no road rage incidents taking place, which means both mine and Whiskey's morales were sky high.

Once Whiskey and I arrived at the well-known staple of Ohio, I practically leapt out of the car because I was too excited to wait. In fact, Whiskey had to do everything in his power to try and stop me from going in early.

"Ah, ah, ah," he said. "I know how excited you are, sugar, but you can't go in without the tickets...and I got 'em right here on my person."

"Damn it!" I exclaimed, climbing out of the truck much calmer than before. "I really thought I'd get away this time."

"Why's that, sugar?" he asked.

I shrugged. "Well, I wanted to give you a run for your money. I hadn't done that in a while."

"Sugar, you always give me a run for my money," he responded. "You make life exciting! Not to mention, you're also kinda crazy, in the best way possible. That's why I love you. You give me something to look forward to every single day."

I bit the inside of my cheek, not knowing what to say next. Anything I could've said is something that I would've already said. Nothing was original!

"Come on, sugar," he finally said. "Let's go have some fun. But family-friendly fun."

"Damn," I said. "You read my mind."

He and I then grasped onto each other's hands tightly as we walked into the museum. "Sugar, I knew what you were thinking long before we managed to get here...and we are keeping things kid-friendly here in public."

"Fine," I groaned sarcastically. "I'll play along."

Once inside, I was immediately struck with awe. I had never seen something so amazing before. I had never seen anything like this before. Then again, I hadn't been out of state in such a long time. Tennessee is such a wonderful state. Why would I ever leave?

"Shit! This is amazing," I said. "I never knew Ohio could have stuff like this."

One of Whiskey's eyebrows hooked upward as if he was confused. "You've never been to Ohio?"

I shook my head back and forth. "Nope. Never."

"Damn, sugar," he said. "Good thing you took up the Statesman job, huh? You get all your traveling in."

I nodded. "New and beautiful sights and experiences. I love that! Plus, I get paid a shit ton to basically beat people up. Now, who wouldn't want that?"

"You sure do like beating people up, don't ya?" he asked, showcasing a bright smile on his face.

"Mmm hmm," I said, nodding up and down vehemently. "You tend to have a desire to unleash all your frustration when you've been constantly beat down for the past couple years."