The Donor to a Vampire (Donor #1)

Chapter 19: The Discovery of Dess

Crying for hours was very cleansing for the soul, although taxing on the eyes. With puffy, red and very itchy eyeballs, I hugged the pillow close for comfort.

That Jackass, Bastard, Dick, Judas...

My mind cursed him so much that the Devil would cover its ears in utter amazement that someone would be that inventive in thinking up all the names to condemn someone to the seven circles of hell and beyond. Betrayal always hurt; however, mixed with disappointment, it was that much harder to swallow, especially by someone you started to think the world of. Burying my face into the pillow, I began to sob.

"Essy, please talk to me," a voice pleaded, snapping me out of my catatonic state.

Will was sitting on the rug with his back against the mattress, his brown-haired head a mess from mussing it repeatedly. He gave me privacy with his back turned toward me; it felt better not to be fussed and watched over. Will let me cry for as long as I want, keeping a silent vigil by my side. Although he seemed to have reached his limit for listening to a woman sob, it was at the three-hour mark. Blubbering an incoherent retort made Will twist, leaning his elbows on the mattress. Green eyes laced with worry looked into my sad amber ones.

"Why did Lysander seem as if he massacred his way out of The Saw?"

Blood rushed from my face whilst my hands became clammy with cold sweat. The memory of Ly clawing and gnawing at his trusted Created swam into my mind with a vengeance. Good God, was G even alive? I began to quiver, not sure if I wished to know the answer to that question. Guilt was worming its way into my chest, corroding away until nothing but rust remained, and its rugged, uneven surface wound the walls of my heart that had already bled. It was my fault. I couldn't deny it; G wouldn't have been hurt if I hadn't pushed Ly to the brink.

Will carefully prodded, still waiting for an answer. "Essy?"

"I-If I just stayed with you," I sputtered, hardly able to form the words around the lump in my throat, "n-none of this w-w-would have h-happened." Burying my face into the wet pillow, I resumed what I had done when I arrived at Wills's suite, and the shock wore off.

"Och' aye," Will remarked with far too much agreement for it to be genuine, "And if ifs' and buts' were candy and nuts, we would all have a Merry Christmas," he said in a slightly sardonic tone before continuing. "Not yer' fault, any of it. Ye aren't Nostradamus to see the future. Nor is the mighty Varshawsky heir infallible. Julius and that tart of a Donor are the only ones at fault."

Reaching for a tissue, I stopped, "I thought you didn't know what happened."

Will lifted his brow, "I do congratulate myself on possessing enough of a brain to see a bloodied Stainless on one end, then notice a screaming Stainless without a limb on the other and connecting the two."

"I—I," Stammering in reply, my loyalty towards Ly was still intact. I was raised to keep secrets I was trusted with. To just reveal what happened without a second thought seemed wrong. Was there still an obligation that bound me to secrecy? I did sign a contract; however, other than that, nothing more. Not anymore. As he said, we are not lovers or friends.

"Just tell me what ye' can." Wills' green eyes assured me everything would be alright, and I cracked.

After what happened, I was at least allowed to explain something. Otherwise, my sanity was on the line to become its' opposite sister: insanity. "While I went to 'powder, my nose', Ali came and told me not to go the same way I came. I didn't listen to her, and Julius dragged me forcefully to the empty room. Kendra was there waiting, gleeful."

While I was explaining the synopsis, Will's eyes grew more expansive than the full moon. If he wanted to comment, he showed restraint and held his breath. I retold how Ly relieved Julius off his right arm and menacingly threatened Kendra. Coated in blood, ecstatic by the fear he aroused out of them. Suddenly, like someone shot my behind with a few electric volts, I jumped and glanced at my arm. The bile rose as I saw that there was still some dried blood on me. Running to the bathroom, I opened the waterpipe, snatched the soap, and washed compulsively at the reddish-brown stain. The skin underneath soon turned a violent shade of pink.