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𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐞, 𝐍𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐡 𝐂𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐚 𝐊𝐢𝐨𝐫 𝐉𝐚𝐜𝐤𝐬𝐨𝐧 "𝐉𝐮𝐢𝐜𝐲"
May, Monday 11:35 a.m. ——————————— Audio Entry #2: I'm just so tired of always having to pick up the pieces of this broken home. A home I no longer live in, a home where a mother treats her every child like they not her own. A home where she's never there, but when she is "home" she's insufferable to be around. A home where the energy is toxic and depressing, where "family is bipolar, fake, toxic, and draining. What's so crazy is that the grown ass adults I would run to as a kid would tell me that I was acting ungrateful towards my mother, that she don't have to love me to care for me, and that at least I had a roof over my head and clothes on my back.
But does the clothes on my back mean anything when they get ripped off my body by her, left with bloodstains and tears caused by her. Or a roof that hides the ugliness and hate that goes on. Naaaa none of that shit matter. When it's no love in it, like it's not genuine it really doesn't mean shit. But here I am still putting her broken pieces back together again.
Truly, as a kid it's hard to trust people but as you grow older it's even harder cause you don't know peoples intentions right off rip. So I observe. I wasn't as observant as a jit, I didn't pay attention so I got hurt.
But I know better now.
I ended my recording and grabbed all of my things then left out of my car. I was at my mama house trying to figure out why she would wanna hurt herself, but then failed to do so.
I don't know.
I walked in and set my things down by the corner of the foyer and headed upstairs. I made it to her room with Mahj standing over her bedside, trying to give her meds to take.
"Ma here, stop playin & shit and open yo mouf."
"...She not even tryna open her mouth and you not fenna force feed her either." I told Mahjae, as I walked in he looked back and blew out a breath.
"She so fucking stubborn twin." He shook his head.
"And I'a be dead ass wrong if I sit up here and shove these bitches down her throat tho, right?" He looked to me and then held his face to the side.
"It ain't worth it..." I shrugged.
"...mhm Nema was up here earlier." He told me, checking his phone and setting pills down on her side table.
"I know she called me. She said mama spit on her. That's why she left and went home." I laughed, lowkey. "That's so trifling tho mama."
