potato randomly half-venting?

shut inside.

i don't feel a thing.
i don't care about this.
i don't like this time.
i don't hate it, either.

i feel nothing about christmas.
i feel nothing about most days.
i feel nothing about most things.
i feel nothing.

i feel like i should be happy but im not
im really not

and everything makes that seem like a bad thing
i just dont feel anything about christmas ok

but i keep on faking
pretending feigning
acting like i give a shit
about this time of year

but i don't want presents
i just want to disappear

i don't want to do anything anymore
i don't want to see anyone anymore
i don't want to go anywhere anymore
i don't want to be on earth anymore

i want to be fictional
i don't want to be real
i'm tired of this life
i want to truly be alive.

i want to be a fictional character
in a show or game or whatever
where i can live my life better
instead of being trapped under
what my current life has to offer
to a fourteen year old daughter
who just wants to be happier
and not a fucking worker

i don't want to help society
i don't want to engage with society
i don't want to be in society
i don't want to work with society
i don't want to please society
i don't want to BE society

i'd rather be shut inside
with happiness beside
me and my mind
and we can just lie

all together, feeling better
then i ever could with other
people who seem to be willingly
puppets on society's strings

Being shut inside was the best time of my life.

^
heh, ten words.