Queen of Ashes │ Season 1 │The Journey

14 │A lonely lamb

Freya's bath was delightful. She didn't have a maid's help but she was content with tending to her needs herself. Once the staff member prepared the bathtub filled with hot water and scented oils, she dived in, immediately relaxing under the hot water and steam. A simple set of soaps was within reach, so she grabbed one and ravenously started to clean all the dirt and Frida's smell from her skin.

Her thoughts wandered toward the events of the last days.

Her life truly turned upside down during this time. A few days ago she was just a bastard child, prepared for her life-long duty of representing her father on matters like common people's problems. The purity of her royal status wasn't important for these kinds of things, so she could focus on helping instead of fighting the aristocracy's unnecessary prejudices.

For the commonage, her mother's lineage was as important as the previous season's fashion trends, making her often forget about all the limitations this stuff presented in the palace. She enjoyed the feeling of freedom, so after her first assignment, she knew she could put her whole heart into this representative job.

At first, people were slightly confused. They didn't know how to address her correctly and how to communicate their needs. She was after all—a woman, and being in a close relationship with the king on top of that—one reason even though she had tried very hard, she'd never blend perfectly. After a while though, her relentless and bold nature convinced them about her capability and common sense. Her powerful will and argumentation were no lesser than from any man at her place before and their communication improved to such a degree, that many of these people became her friends. She was even invited to family dinners a few times. That brought her a sliver of joy.

Now, that part could be considered a history and she was terrified of the new role awaiting her. The truth was, she wasn't feeling like a queen material. She was too untamed to be a good one. She had a very strong will, which was an inadequacy for this kind of position. Also, she hadn't been feeling all right that she had to marry the man she didn't get to know earlier and who forced her to do so by threatening her people. She had already resented him for doing so. She couldn't imagine being close to this kind of person, and more, sharing a bed—first and foremost woman's duty in marriage.

Dear gods... She would have to share a bed with him! Up to this moment, she hadn't thought about this, but right now she was ready to puke. She had some lustful moments in her life, but these were all on her terms. She decided where they'd started, and where they ended. Definitely not in anyone's bed...

Here, she wouldn't be so lucky. She would have a lot of duties, and that one was of the most importance. One reason she loved the true nature of her origin was that she wasn't impelled to worry about that kind of fate. Her father told her so. She wasn't supposed to marry, if not for love...

Funny thing, fate. Hers had been truly hilarious so far. She could only hope it didn't have the same sense of humor when it came to Eloise's or Emmett's future...

Slowly, the water turned cold. She didn't know how long she was laying there thinking about how fucked up her life turned out to be, but she felt it could be at least an hour. She glanced at the window. It was beginning to lighten. Time to get out and prepare for a spectacle she so impatiently awaited.

Freya raised and reached for a towel. Quickly, she wiped herself and decided to wear only a thin, well-fitted nightgown. Not that summer air demanded a lot of layers. She was about to go to sleep shortly and this piece of comfort clothing was all she could dream of right now.

A cup of already lukewarm tea in her hand and she was staring at one of the most beautiful views in her entire life. The sun already had started to rise and to her eyes emerged not only an extensive set of ships but—what was more important—an endless beauty of the deep sea waters. The view was one of a kind and she couldn't avert her gaze even when a silent knock was heard from the door. She simply said "Come in," not caring who they were and what they wanted. Probably not her brightest moment, but all reasonable thinking seemed to disappear at this point. It was the sea she was focused on.