The Devil《Ghost x Reader》2

CHAPTER TWELVE

"Delta! Come in Delta!" ghosts voice blast through the talkie, causing me to push myself up. 
"I'm okay." I huff out, feeling the adrenaline changing.
"I'll find a way down to you. stay put." Ghost orders.
"Rog'." I huff again as I sit myself down, taking in deep hard breaths. the cold air doesn't help this shit, not one bit. I'm snapped out of my small break as I hear a twig snap nearby. my head turns to all possible directions it could have come from. I turn to grab my gun, only to realize the two rifles detached in the fall.
"Shit!" 
I go the unclip my handgun, until a man jumps onto me, holding their tactical knife near my jugular. Konni
my hands grip his, trying to push the knife away from me, until I could snatch it from his, slicing his throat open with a span of 10 seconds. I push his convulsing body to the side, pushing myself away from him, feeling my body shifting into another panic attack like at the small island. deep breaths slowly coming back rather than short fast breaths. I detach my handgun finally, shifting over to see three more Konni, shooting them all dead in seconds, thinking that was all until another pulls me back with his arm around my neck tightly, thrashing my body around as I try to get out of his grasp.

"[I have her, what should I do?]" he says in Russian, causing the panic attack to come back at full blast, remembering something like this at Urzikstan.
I slightly pick myself up, gripping onto his arm before throwing him over my back, watching him slam into the floor in front of me. I grab the tactical knife from the snow, jumping on top of the Konni until he starts to fight back, holding my hand with the knife in it. as that hand is battling the dumb cunt, I pull out my Knife, swiftly amputating the hand that grips my wrist. hearing the screams from the man only feeds into the manic state I'm in. tears finally break out as I grip my hand, plunging the knife into his throat and chest over and over again as I sit on his body, only seeing the man from Urzikstan. 
I feel uncontrollable screaming breaking through my throat as I repeat the same action over and over again, until an unknown force pulls me back off the man. 
I thrash around, trying to get out of the new grip I'm in swinging my free hand behind me in a fist, making contact to the man grabbing me, feeling his body fall a little until he gets back up, gripping my other hand. my body is in a grip that makes it harder to move, keeping me one place. I'm fighting against the man until the feeling of him cupping my cheek suddenly overcomes everything, as if I just drunk hot chocolate on a cold day.
the fuzziness of my hearing and sight starts to clear up, seeing a familiar masked man. 

"You're alright now. look at me. that 'a girl." he says in a calm manner, feeling him softly take the knife out of my hand while keeping hold of the eye contact and my cheek.
"There we go." Ghost continues, playing with his gear for a second. 
"We need to go," my voice cracks as I breathlessly remind him.
"We don't need to do anything. like I said, they're big boys." he returns, stroking my face as if he's somewhat cleaning something off. 
I try to look down to my hands, only for ghost to force my gaze back up to his eyes.
"don't do that. keep your eyes on mine alright." he softly demands as his hand leaves my cheek, grabbing my hand in return. I feel a sudden warmth over my hands as he plays with them.
"we're going to get up, you keep your eyes forward, do you understand." he commands softly, slightly helping me to my feet. 
"Let me do the work, just stay close behind me, okay." I nod my head, feeling lightheaded for some reason. 
"Stay right next to me, as close as you can." he continues as we walk, following his demand. 

what the fuck is wrong with me? why the fuck is this happening? I have no idea why this shit is happening to me all of a sudden. Urzikstan wasn't that bad for me to be acting like this. 
I stick close to ghost, following his demand and his every move. I'm sure he's said a few things to me, but everything is still too fuzzy to even hear him until he turns completely to me, waking me up from my daze.
"I managed to save your guns from the snow, I'm going to need you hundred percent here, okay." I nod my head softly, repeating the same thing only with a harder nod, trying to knock away the manic state.
"Yes sir." I answer, taking the gun, instantly loading it with new ammo. I follow close behind ghost, shooting at the left-over Konni on the frozen water, never hitting a target.
"Ghost, were coming to you." The captain says over the radio.
"Roping LZ near the boat now. form up on my mark- AO is hot." Ghost replies to him, hearing them both as I continue shooting, killing what I assume to be the last one stands up over us, shooting missiles. 
"This way, Bravo." Ghost says through his radio, confirming the Konni have been neutralized. 
"Are you alright?" Ghost asks me. I just nod my head to him rather than talk, knowing my voice will betray me with a crack. 
"Watcher to Bravo-6. what's your status, john?" Laswell says to Price.
"At the LZ. Need to hold position until Nik's on station with the helo." Price says, scaring me a little, not realizing he's right next to us now. still slightly manic obviously.
"Gear up. there'll be more of 'em here soon." hearing Ghost say that made me sigh in frustration, just wanting all of this over with at this point.

"Konni reinforcements heading out way!" Farah warns.