My Other Half

A turn of events

Billie's pov
I've been doing a lot of thinking whilst Natalia has been living with us and I'm not sure whether it's harmful or not. It's tricky because on one hand, she makes me feel incredible—invincible—and on the other... terrified. She left not too long ago for Robichaux's and I haven't been able to move since.

I'm sat at the dining table, my cup of coffee getting colder and colder as I grip it tightly between my hands. Initially, I explained my fixation by using her fragility as an excuse; she needed someone and I was more than happy to be that person. However, I realized I may not have been completely honest about that. Of course I wanted to be there for her, lift her up, remind her of who she is.

Yet, there was always this indescribable feeling I couldn't place. Then I realized, as I was talking to her, that I knew all along what it was and just failed to admit it to myself. I love her. "Babe?" I lift my head as my senses return and I feel Audrey's hand on my shoulder. I place a hand on top of hers, gripping it securely as a means to ground myself and she notices this of course.

Her eyebrows furrow as she takes a seat next to me, never letting go of my hand. In fact, she takes her other and clasps mine between the two. "What's troubling you, love?" she asks and I'm not even sure what to tell her. There's no good way to say it and so I decide to just rip the bandaid off. "I think... I love her" I confess and stare at her anxiously waiting for her reaction.

"And?" she prompts calmly, then again, she's a phenomenal actress so I'm not quite sure whether she's actually calm. My brain is too scrambled to process her body language. "And... I don't know what to do" I whisper as my breathing becomes irregular, fear rising in me. I'm not sure if I'm more afraid of losing Audrey or of what the cost will be if I try to have it all.

You can never have it all, it's practically impossible; a fool's dream. "Shhh, it's ok" she whispers, moving to stand next to me, cradling my head in her hands and pulling me close. I hold her tightly, pressing my face to her belly as I try not to cry. I've never been faced with something like this before and it's thrown me off balance.

Typically I'm calm and collected but I've truly steered far off course. "We'll figure this out, ok?" she whispers after pulling away to sit again. "How?" I ask shakily, "well... firstly, what do you want? Do you think you want a relationship with her or..." I furrow my eyebrows as I think about her question and squeeze her hand a bit tighter.

"I want... I want you both" I whisper, "i-if that's something possible" I add nervously. It's quiet for a while and I don't dare to look at her, afraid of her reaction even though she's very good at controlling her facial expressions. "I can't deny that I've... been feeling some things towards her too" she mumbles and I quickly raise my head to search her eyes, finding nothing but sincerity.

"Nothing... sexual, per se. Just an affection I don't normally experience" she thinks aloud, "I noticed but I thought—well, that you were just trying to be nice" I admit and she chuckles. "I don't think we should say anything just yet... she's still recovering I think" I agree with her, it might not be the best time to put this on her but at least I know Audrey and I are in one accord about this.

Natalia's pov
I arrive back to Billie's, I guess it's kinda 'home' at this point. There's soft music playing which I find a bit odd considering the house is typically pretty quiet. I can smell dinner is ready and my stomach responds immediately. I'm beyond happy the food is already cooking because I'm starving.

Billie comes around the corner and smiles widely at me, making quick but light steps towards the door. She wraps me in her arms I flinch a bit in surprise but soon return it. "How was your day, bunny?" she asks softly and I notice her eyes are a bit more lively than usual. "Ummm... good" I mumble and she places a hand on my lower back, leading me into the dining room.