Our Tantalizing Trials

The Apology?

The day dragged after my morning at the Three Broomsticks, like many Sundays do. I jogged back to Hogwarts, stopping back at Hagrid's to give him some muffins Rosmerta made. Heaven knows he probably gets tired of the rock hard ones he usually bakes.

After a long shower, I headed to the common room to relax before I had to spend the rest of my evening in detention.

"Hey Ave," Harry pats the couch next to him and I sit, leaning into his side, "You look tired."

"It's been a long morning I guess. Took a jog and ran into Malfoy at the Three Broomsticks. He just won't stop teasing me about Cedric."

"That's odd. How does he even know anything about you and Ced?"

"I guess he saw us talking and then noticed me waiting in the library. Even claims to have seen Cedric with Cho that day."

"Oohf," Harry puffs his cheeks and lets out an exasperated blow, "Yeah, that probably didn't look too good on Cedric's part."

"I don't even care at this point. I think Malfoy's comments have been bothering me because I've just been upset with Cedric's dishonesty. At the end of the day, I thought he really liked me. You know honesty is so important to me, even in friendship, so when Cedric left me dry even after I had approached him about being distant it really hurt my feelings. I haven't felt like that with anyone in a longtime, so I guess I'm just disappointed that I thought he could actually like me."

I feel water coming to my eyes and I can't tell if it's from the Cedric situation or if I'm just really tired of everything. Harry notices my glossy eyes.

"Oh Ave," He sighs and puts his arm around me pulling me into a hug. His chin rests on top of my head and I close my eyes, trying to get the burning tears to go away. Resting my head on his shoulder, I try to take deep breaths and calm my heart rate. My throat feels like it's full of barbed wire and I try to swallow the feeling away.

"How's your heart rate?" Harry asks, grabbing my wrist and placing a finger to my pulse, "deep breaths, remember?"

"I'm okay," I replied, collecting myself. Harry knows that I sometimes struggle with panic attacks and they can tend to sneak up on me when I get overwhelmed. He has always been there to breathe with me and bring my heart rate down. Not many people know that I struggle with panic attacks, but I like to keep it that way.

We sat that way for a while, Harry and I talking about school, life, and who we think is going to win the quidditch match in a couple days.

Walking down towards the dungeons is always thrilling because I can see the great lake through the windows. I think it is so cool how the light reflects green onto the floors and adds an eerie feeling to the atmosphere. Malfoy is already in the potions ingredient closet when I arrive. To be fair, I think it looks way better than when we started a few days ago. The odd stench from yesterday has dissipated and most of the shelfs look organized into neat rows.

"Look who's finally arrived," Malfoy turns and sees me, probably noticing my puffy eyes and messy hair, "Oof. Did you go for another run?" he asks with a slight smirk.

I don't respond, not having the energy to give Malfoy the satisfaction of knowing that he's bothering me. His expression goes flat and he turns his back to me again making a small hmmp sound and returning his attention to the herbs on the shelf. I spin on my heel and walk down the aisle that I assume he just finished, double checking the placement.

I scan the shelf and check the order, which should be alphabetical. This isn't hard for me because I have always loved plants and identifying potion ingredients is just like recalling what I saw in the garden. I start at one end. Flowerhead, fluxweed, flying seahorse, and... gillyweed? That should not be there. It should be foxglove.