Say Puta

☀4 ☀

I have mentioned the story for another time, and by another time, I meant another chapter i.e. this one.

Okay, you already know that this happened on my freshman year. A lot of shit went down in here, so pay attention. This might take a while.

Ahem. So, I entered a new school where I didn't know anyone. I'm thankful that my brother was in the same school, but he's too busy with his friends to give some time for me.

Anyway, I was standing in front of our room on the first day of school, waiting for the adviser to open the door. When she did, a lot of people flooded in there and started cleaning. This was strange for me. Who the fuck actually bothers to clean up the room on the first day of school?

I was just settling down when this short guy came up to me and asked me if I was a new dude. I said yes, and he replied that the new dudes' room is the one on the other side. I looked at him like he was crazy. The room was clearly marked with 1-SSC, first year science class, and the adjacent room was 2-SSC. We had this crazy curriculum that involved isolating those with superior intellect into one small building. That means that the four year levels spent their time away from other students in their batch. Sucks. The small then explained that the classes had switched rooms, so I had to follow his instructions despite my doubts.

Moving on, the 2-SSC was still locked and it was already past eight, so I went to the cafeteria to grab some food. When I returned, classes had already started, and I was like, WTF I didn't even hear the bell ring. Anyway, I entered the 2-SSC room and I caught the eyes of all the people in there, including the small dude. I had to greet them with "Goomonin' classmates" then the teacher scolded me for being in the second year room. Once again, I was all WTF and just ran out. I entered the 1-SSC room and got the same reaction, but this time I got scolded for being thirty minutes late. I so wanted to unleash my middle finger on them, but great power comes with great responsibility. I just sat there and waited for the day to be over.

The next day, my mother who was a teacher at that school asked me if I made any friends. I said "nuh uh" because they are all bitches. So in order to make sure that I've had the worst experience in highschool, she went to our class and personally introduced me in front of my classmates and the older students too. Fuuuck, I wanted to dig my grave and bury myself in embarrassment. Do you know how it feels like to not know the difference of being laughed at and laughing with? By the end of the day, I earned my title as Le Mama's Boy.

Normally, I've managed to get myself some friends. The class clown, Xe, the one with a glass eye, Js and an otaku, Jp. Eccentrics. Yup. We were pretty close...or so I thought. I've observed that whoever is not around in our group got rebuked like he's satan's shit. How hard is it to shut your mouth about what you think? It got so bad that they'd talk shit about each other implicitly even with all of us together.

The group was falling apart. I think that if I wasn't with them, they might actually skin each other. I'm like the glue of the group. Self-proclaimed. Shut up.

I ended up sticking with Xe and Jp, who hate each other's guts. Js was kinda left out because of his jig. One day he just decided to grab everyone's dicks, so I had to put my hands in my pockets and cover my crotch whenever he's around. Fucker.

There was this one time with Js where we got blamed for breaking an umbrella of some bitch, which was total bullshit. The umbrella was already wrecked when we found it, yet the bitchy owner said otherwise and demanded that we pay for it. Of course I refused, so the bitch called our advisor, who reprimanded us. Our advisor was all like, "ya betta' pay fo' the umbrella, ya fools!"

And I was like, "Nuh uh, I ain't the one who wrecked that shit."

And Js tapped at my hand and told me to shut up. Why would I? I won't be held responsible for false accusations. Js that spineless motherf-

***

That's just for starters.

A month passed by without much incident except maybe me feeling like I should kill myself everyday.

By some unknown miracle, I somehow managed to snag a girlfriend. Without having to court her. (I can see that you're jealous!) I don't know, she just stuck to me like glue, demanding that I hold her hand even during classes. She also keeps calling me every minute that we're not together. She sat right behind my seat, so the adviser noticed our shenanigans.

The news spread like wildfire among the teachers. While most relationships were overlooked, my mother's prominence and unconscious blabbermouthedness caused it to become an issue.

I once had to visit a birthday party of my classmate whose parent was also a teacher, and my mother took the chance to gossip about it. My classmate's mother was all like, "WTF they're so young it's disgusting, yuck!"

Seriously?

To make matters worse, my gf was calling me relentlessly the entire time. Good thing my phone was on vibrate.

The evil stares of the teachers never ended. Yeah they totally hate me.

---

There was this one time when me and my gf were assigned on a group investigatory project along with some few others. My gf had a small argument against the rest of the group while I remained ever neutral, acting as the judge. When they finally asked my opinion, their rebuttal speaches were "Go ahead. Choose your girl!" And my gf was like, "Come on... Pick them over me!"

And my immediate answer was "you bitches are all wrong. I don't have to explain my reason, you're just wrong."

My head was hurting like crap at the time, so I had trouble remembering what happened next.

Near the end of the school year, we celebrate the town's foundation day, and we were required to perform a dance. At the practice, I struck a conversation with a girl, M, whom I'm not really close with. I figured that it might be a good chance to gain a friend, you know?

I regret it.

The next day my gf was running a lawnmower at my ass, thinking that I was flirting with M. I didn't even have the chance to explain myself.

When the day of the celebration came, my costume for the dance looked like shit, even with the help of my gf. Bz, however, was looking fine.

I escaped the confines of my classroom and was confronted by my bitch classmates.

This is the gist of our exchange:

"Hey, you and your gf are real chummy. We already know that you and your gf are doing it!"

"We're not doing anything"

"Pfft. She doesn't love you anymore, she likes Bz. Look at your crappy costume. Your gf helped Bz with his and he's lookin' mighty fine. Face it, she left yo' sorry ass!"

"Then why did you bother telling me that we're doing it?"

I didn't really say the last part, because I'm still sucking in the left you part.

The following days came, and sure enough, gf showed signs of affection towards Bz, explicitly so that I may overhear or see for myself. That must be her way of getting back at me.

We never uttered a word that we'd break up, so I guessed that we're still good.

---

My teachers. Ugh. Where do I even start?

Maybe next time.