Days were coming and going. I was closing my eyes with the first light of the day, sleeping until sunset, and repeating that.
For the most part of the day, I didn't even know the time.
I ditched all of my classes in the first two weeks. After I left Yin's apartment, I got some groceries and went straight to my room. Didn't leave it since.
My friends tried to check on me, but I told them I needed time. Yin was the most worried one among them, he said he felt bad that he made me listen to that message. I made him sure that I was okay.
Usually, I was being careful with what I ate and I was execising regularly. This last month was harsh on my body as I didn't do them both. I just ate what Sarawat wanted me to ate, and I couldn't find energy to execise.
One must reach to very deep first to go up again.
I decided to wallow in sadness for two weeks. Just for that time, I ate ice cream for breakfast, ate pizza at 3 a.m. I didn't study or learn anything new. I watched cartoons and old movies. I played stupid games. Even downloaded that farm game. It was pretty fun!
I didn't take a shower. Didn't clean my room. I was only taking out the trash. That was the only time I stepped outside of my room too. I was doing it at night so I wouldn't see people and had to interact with them.
And it was... so peaceful.
I didn't look at my phone. I warned my friends that I didn't want to hear anything about him. Not now, not ever.
What's done was done.
I didn't call my therapist either. She told me I could reach out to her whenever I felt down. But I didn't want to work on myself emotionally. Not at this moment. Later.
Two weeks.
For two weeks, I only listened to Roar from Katy Perry, I Will Survive from Gloria Gaynor and Let It Go from Elsa.
I only ever watched my favorites.
On saturday, there was a knock on my dorm room. I thought one of the people next to me was disturbed by the sound of my laptop.
"Was I loud?" I opened the door while saying.
"No. In fact, you didn't make a peep."
Yin was looking at me.
"Uhmmm."
"Wow. You look... nice."
"Uuuhh."
"Can I come in? Greaaat."
He just came inside.
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"Uhhmm"
"I see you've been eating... is that spaghetti in a wrapped up pizza slice?"
