On Thin Ice

39. Group Therapy

Minnow's POV

7:57 pm

I gripped the strap of my purse, staring up at the bulletin board full of flyers. The community center was dimly lit, the smell of lemon-scented cleaner filling my nose.

My gut was in knots. I knew that was going to be hard but I didn't expect to feel so sick to my stomach.

Whitney was overjoyed when I asked her for information about the domestic violence support group. I remembered the day of the week they met. She insisted on driving me but I had already asked Soren to drop me off.

I told him to return in an hour to pick me up, but he told me he'd wait outside. I didn't tell him what I was doing or what the meeting was for and he respected that.

"Are you here for the DV group meeting?"

I turned and was greeted with a smile from an older black woman. She looked like she was in her mid-sixties.

"Um...hi. Yes, I'm new."

She nodded her head and led me down the corridor. "Nothing to be nervous about. I'm very glad you could join us. What's your name?"

"Minnow."

"My name is Dorinda."

She opened a door. Chairs were already placed in a circle, and a few women were seated, speaking quietly amongst themselves. I was suddenly aware that someone might recognize me.

I wasn't that well known but I also wasn't completely unknown. What if something about this surfaced online? What if people thought Soren was the one that--

"You can go ahead, and take a seat," she offered, before heading over to the table full of baked goods and water.

I quietly took a seat and fiddled with my top, feeling like everyone was staring at me. Most of the women looked around my age or in their thirties, most of them belonging to Black or Latin ethnicity.

Everyone seemed comfortable with one another like this wasn't their first meeting. The only woman who wasn't talking sat directly across from me. Her bangs covered most of her light brown-skinned face and she wore large glasses over her blue eyes, drawing attention away from her overall face. She looked just as nervous as I felt, her hands twiddling with the hem of her blouse. Her eyes caught mine but she quickly looked away, like she was embarrassed.

"Alright, ladies let's begin."

The room quieted as Dorinda, sat at the head of the circle, her eyes scanning each of us.

"I just want to start by saying," Her eyes landed on me as she spoke. "This is a safe space. Anything we talk about stays here. And welcome...you should be proud of yourself. Showing up is oftentimes the hardest part of all of this."

The tension in my chest eased and I sighed.

She explained that we didn't need to give our names and we could share as much as we wanted.

Then the conversations started. She asked about some of the things we've been struggling with and how life post-domestic violence had been.

"I think, I always thought leaving would just fix things," A woman named Mallory said. She had explained how she had just left her husband with her two kids. "That magically everything would fall into place. But I'm finding it hard to keep things together."

"The real work begins when you leave," Dorinda said, her gaze heavy and meaningful. "It's when the inner work has to be done. For you and the kids."

Niyah spoke about how her ex-boyfriend hadn't taken the break-up well and how she had to get a restraining order.