The Waters - A Beta Squad Story (bxb)

28. Is It Worth It?

Around an hour later, Aj found himself standing outside the building he had just had his first therapy session in. Chunkz had sent him a message telling him to call as soon as he had finished his session. Though Aj was hesitating to do so as he leaned up against the brick wall.

He had just spent the last hour talking about his problems, and he knew they hadn't even put a dent into all they needed to talk about. It was overwhelming, and he didn't know how to feel. His legs buckled beneath him as he slid down to sit on the moat of small stones surrounding the building.

He pulled out his phone and dialled Chunkz's number. The phone rang only two times before it was answered. "Hey, Aj. How'd it go?" Chunkz asked, his voice gentle.

Aj just hummed in response, not wanting to hear his own voice any longer. He leaned his head back against the wall, closing his eyes and sighing heavily.

"You know, Aje, I am so proud of you, brother. You did great—really great. You're gonna be just fine. One step at a time." Chunkz said encouragingly, his voice full of warmth and sincerity. "But Aj, I need you to talk to me. How are you feeling right now?"

Aj took a deep breath before answering. "I don't know, man. It's just...so overwhelming. There's still so much I need to talk about, and I feel like I'm just scratching the surface." He paused, feeling a lump form in his throat. "I'm scared, Chunkz. I don't know if I can keep doing this. I don't know if I can keep fighting." He wiped away a tear that had managed to escape his eye.

There was a long silence on the other end of the line before Chunkz finally spoke. "Listen to me, Aj. You can do this. You're stronger than you think you are. And I'm not going to let you go through this alone. We're in this together, remember? You've got me, Aj. You've got Sharky, Kenny... and Niko. We'll get through this, okay?" He heard rustling noises from the other end. "I'm on the way to get you now. Just stay put, okay? I'll be there in a few." The phone beeped, signalling the end of the call.

Back at the house, Niko saw Chunkz rushing down the stairs in search of something. "Hey, man, what you looking for?"

Chunkz didn't respond, either from not hearing the younger man or because he chose to ignore him. He hurried through the living room, barely even registering Niko as he sat in the kitchen.

Chunkz ran back into the kitchen, jumping when he saw Niko just sitting there watching him. "Niko, man, you scared me, brother." He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. He looked around the room, searching for something. "Have you seen my keys?"

Niko shrugged. "I haven't seen them since you had them yesterday. Why? You in a hurry?"

Chunkz let out a frustrated groan. "Yeah, I'm trying to get to Aj. He needs me. He's not doing too well after his-" He paused, looking at Niko.

"Therapy session? He told me, don't worry. Is he alright?" Niko asked, concerned.

Chunkz took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. He didn't want to seem too overbearing, but he also needed to make sure his friend was okay. "I think it's just hitting him hard, you know? Talking about all that stuff...it's tough." He ran his hand through his hair, pacing the kitchen a little. "But Aj's strong. He's been through worse, and he's come out on top. I just need to be there for him, you know? Aha!" Chunkz exclaimed, finding the keys in the pantry.

"Can I come with?" Chunkz froze, turning to look at Niko. He hadn't expected the younger man to want to come along. He wasn't sure if it was a good idea, but he also didn't want to send Niko away. If Aj had told him about the appointment, then maybe it was for a reason. He hesitated for a moment, then nodded slowly. "Yeah, sure. Why not? The more support, the better, right?"

Chunkz already knew the address from their research, so as soon as they got in the car, he started driving. It didn't take them long to get there. They pulled up and parked, seeing the crumpled ball of the boy still sitting against the side of the building. Chunkz quickly got out of the car, hurrying over to his friend.

He knelt down on the concrete as Aj lifted his head and crawled over to him, collapsing into his chest as he began to sob uncontrollably. Chunkz held him, rubbing his back and whispering soothing words in his ear. He set his gaze on Niko, who had walked up silently and now stood a respectful distance away.

"It's okay, Aj. It's okay to feel like this. You're doing so well, dude. I'm so proud of you." He stroked Aj's back, trying to calm him down. He looked back at Niko again, unsure how the younger man was taking all this.

Aj wasn't fully aware that Niko was even here, so when he looked up to see the tall man, he suddenly felt embarrassed. He wiped his eyes and tried to pull away from Chunkz, who held him close, not wanting to let him go.

"Niko's here too, Aj. He wanted to be here for you," Chunkz said softly, rubbing his back. Aj glanced at Niko again, feeling a little ashamed of himself for acting this way. He took a deep breath and sat up a little straighter, wiping his nose on his sleeve.

Both men guessed that Aj might become nonverbal for a short while, but they were understanding of this.

Chunkz stood up, lifting Aj with him into a standing position. He kept one arm around his friend's shoulder, supporting him as he leaned against him. The three men walked back to the car. Chunkz helped Aj into the back of the car, then went to sit in the driver's seat.

Niko stood outside the open car door in front of Aj. He didn't know where he should sit or whether it would be appropriate to be near Aj at this time. In the end, he didn't need to decide, as he felt Aj's hesitant and cold hand grasp at his wrist. Looking down at Aj, he gave him a soft smile and slowly slid into the car beside him.

"So, um...how are you feeling?" Niko asked, not really sure what to say.

"Please don't." Aj finally answered, his voice barely above a whisper and cracking sadly.

Niko swallowed and nodded slowly. "Okay," he replied gently, not wanting to press further. He peeked over at Chunkz through the mirror, who was driving away from the building. The man shot him a sympathetic look before focusing his attention back on the road.

Niko was staring out the window when he heard Aj unbuckle his seatbelt. He turned to see Aj lowering his head and lying on his lap, his legs curling up on the other seat.

Niko placed a hand on the side of Aj's face and went to touch his hair before pausing to check for any signs of discomfort coming from the other. Aj made no attempt to remove Niko's hand, and so the taller man threaded his fingers through the curls on the younger man's head. He watched as Aj's eyes fluttered closed at the feeling.

Chunkz didn't want to take Aj back to the house, knowing he would just lock himself in his room, which would only worry him further. He decided to keep driving, taking them to the beach, hoping it would offer a peaceful environment for Aj to open up.

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My heart breaks for poor Aj.
Also next two chapters are already written however I need to proofread and edit them and I have work tomorrow/today (I'm from Britain) and Monday so we will see if I have time. But I will try my hardest for you guys.

Next chapter will be a serious talk with Niko and Chunkz...

Love you all.
- B🎧