Alvin's Hidden Life

Chapter 14: Simon: Unsolvable Puzzle

Alvin was impossible! I could not understand how I'd lived with him my whole life and not gone insane. To be honest, what really frustrated me about the way Alvin was acting was the potential he had to hurt others. I was just worried about what was going to happen to Brittany. No matter how self-centered and bossy she could be, I didn't want her to get hurt, but there was no talking sense to him! For once, I was lost on what to do next. It was an unsolvable puzzle. I could tell Brittany that Alvin thinks she is an alien, therefore breaking her heart, or I wait for him to tell her, which would also result in her heart broken. My only other option was to continue trying to convince Alvin she couldn't be an alien. As I came to the conclusion that option three was what I would have to go with, I saw Theodore walking over to me and looking around.

"Theodore, are you ready to go home?"

"Sure Simon, where's Alvin?"

I answered his question trying to hide my contempt.

"He went to the skatepark."

I couldn't believe he went to the skatepark without doing any of the things he needed to do. Well... I could believe it, but I didn't understand how he could be so careless!

"Oh, okay. Do you know what Dave has planned for a snack?"

Theodore began walking, the idea of getting a snack really got him energized.

"No, Theodore. I have no idea. I'm more preoccupied with this whole 'Brittany is an alien' situation."

"You mean Alvin is right? Brittany is an alien? Aaaaaahhhh! Simon, what are we going to do!"

"No, no, Theodore. That's not at all what I meant. I'm just not sure what is going on in Alvin's brain causing him to believe that. That is pretty much the least logical explanation of what is going on."

"Well, if she's not an alien, what do you think is happening, or is..."

He looked around a little and lowered his voice to a whisper, as if what he was about to say was a secret to be shared only with me.

"or is Alvin just making it up again?"

"Just trust me Theodore. And no, I don't think Alvin is making it up, I just think he's extremely delusional."

I couldn't tell him what was really going on. That would be breaking Brittany's trust, but I also owed it to Theodore to make sure Alvin couldn't rope him into his schemes. I had to come up with something relatively quickly to make sure Theodore didn't get dragged into the mess.

"She's only showing common symptoms of the flu, Theodore. Nausea, hallucinations, headaches, tiredness, fatigue. Maybe try to keep your distance so you don't catch it too. She's probably contagious."

The last part was genius. It just popped into my head, but it was sure to keep Theodore far away from the problem.

"Oh! That makes sense Simon! I'm glad she's not an alien, that would be pretty scary."

"Yeah, it would. Just remember Theodore, whatever Alvin tells you about her being an alien is not true. Try not to fall into any of his crazy plans okay. Especially if they have a chance of hurting Brittany."

That was another big concern. It was impossible to know what dangerous thoughts were floating through his brain at any given point in time. He could end up killing her if we weren't careful. Alvin really had no sense of reality. As we walked in the door to our house, I was happy to have a greeting from Dave, and it brightened my day, even if it was just a little bit.

"Hey fellas, how was school today? Where's Alvin?"

"Practicing skateboarding tricks... again."

"It was great Dave! Today at lunch Kevin gave me two of his cookies!"

"Well that was nice of him! How about you Simon?"

"Good."

"Good? Simon! You never have a one word opinion about school! What's going on?"

"Well, honestly Dave, it wasn't nearly as fun as usual."

"What do you mean, Simon?"

"It's Alvin! He's being ridiculous about this whole alien thing and it's driving me crazy!"

"I'm sorry Simon, I'll have a talk with him when he gets home. He really is taking things way too far."

"Anyways, I'm going to head up and do some homework. My science class is doing a unit on subatomic particles right now, which, obviously, I already know a lot about, but the teacher offered a chance to earn some extra credit by creating a presentation on alchemy. Using some of the materials in my lab, I think I may be able to create an experiment that really does turn lead into gold. It will take a large amount of energy, but with the use of some of my other inventions, I may be able to get it to work!"

"That sounds more like you, Simon! Just be careful. These big experiments don't always end well."

"Trust me Dave, the worst thing that could happen would be a power outage, but there's only about a 1.2 percent chance of that happening."

"Alright Simon, have fun!"

In reality, I was not planning to work on an alchemy project, as that would almost certainly result in a complete power outage. Alchemy takes way too much energy to be worth the process. I needed to come up with a solution to the Brittany and Alvin crisis. I needed to find a way to get Alvin to believe me, and then it came to me.

"Eureka!"

If I got Alvin to go on a date with Brittany disguised as an undercover spy mission, he will see how much she really likes him. He will agree to go in order to gain some "intel" on body snatchers! It was perfect! All I had to do was call up Brittany and get her to say yes first, which I was sure would be no problem at all, due to the conditions of the situation. I picked up the phone, calling her number.

("Brittany?")

("Yeah, Simon?")

("Umm... I was wondering if... well, are you busy tonight?")

("No, actually I'm not, is Alvin there?")

I smiled because I could already tell there was no way she turned the opportunity down. She was already asking about Alvin.

("That's actually what I was calling about. He was wondering if you would want to go out to eat tonight with us.")

("What! When? I need to start getting ready!")

("Tonight at 7:00, we were going to go on a picnic.")

("Well, I don't know, Simon, I just... you said Alvin wanted me to come?")

("Well... yeah?")

("Oh, I don't think so, Simon. This is just so last minute and...")

("Brittany, it's not even 4:00 yet, how is this last minute?")

("I'm just nervous okay... tell him... tell him I caught malaria so I can't come.")

("Malaria! Seriously! That's a tropical disease!")

("Well... I just can't do it, Simon.")

As I tried to say something back, the line went dead. She hung up. The call definitely did not go like I had expected it to, and it kind of ruined my entire plan. I figured I would just have to try to think of something else.

"Whooooooo Hooooooooo!"

I rolled my eyes after hearing the cheer from downstairs, because Alvin made it really obvious home. Those two cheers always lead to two other sounds, the first was a crash and the second was Dave yelling, This time was no different than usual. I didn't have to wait long before I heard it.

"ALVINNN!!!"