Blade

7-Silent evil

"Rachel. You need to think this through," dad told me as he followed behind me into my room.

"I already have, dad," I responded as I turned to face him. "This was a bad idea from the beginning."

"No Rachel. That new teacher was right. You are good at this. And I want you to give this a chance."

" Isn't that what I already did?"I asked. I sighed, sliding a hand through my hair. " Dad, I really am sorry, but this ... this just isn't for me."

" What makes you think that?"he asked.

I took in a shaky breath.

"What are you talking about? You saw what happened,"I told him, struggling not to let the memory replay in my head.

"What happened?"he asked. I held my breath. This was something I didn't want to deal with right now, maybe not ever. "You didn't tell Ms Sarah the truth, did you?" My expression must have been enough of an answer. "Rachel..."

"Dad," I stopped him before he could say any more. "Please. I don't want to talk about this."

He looked distressed as he stared at me. I hated that look, mainly because I knew I was the cause.

"I'm sorry," I looked down. "I just can't."

"Not even to your own father?" I winced. "I won't judge you, Rachel. You should know that."

"Don't be so sure. You don't know what happened back there..." I started.

" That's exactly what I need you to tell me,"dad interrupted. He sighed, his jaw clenched. He was losing patience. "Rachel, this has gone on for too long. It's been six years since Andrew died..."

" Don't..."

But my father wasn't listening to me anymore.

"Don't you want a normal life? Don't you want everything to go back to normal?" he asked as he stared into my now teary eyes.

"Things can never go back to normal, dad" I chewed the inside of my cheek. "At least not for me. I caused his death. I deserve to bear the burden of it."

Dad took a deep, steadying breath.

"How many times do I have to tell you... ?"

" That I didn't kill Andrew? I might not have touched him, but it was my fault. Even he knows it."

As soon as those last words left my lips, I regretted them.

Dad blinked, his eyebrows knitting in confusion.

"What do you mean he knows..."

" Nothing," I interrupted quickly. " Nothing, dad. I don't know why I said that"

"No. It's not nothing. Rachel, have you been...?"

" I said it's nothing!" I suddenly yelled, breathing heavily as dad stared back at me, stunned by my sudden aggressiveness. "Just leave." I turned away from him as I said the words. "I need to be alone."

I could feel the long prolonged look dad gave me before he headed for the door.

I bit my lip in a bid to overshadow the pain of regret blooming within me.

"Take your time. I'll fix us something to eat."

He stepped out of the room.

" Rachel?"

I nearly jumped out of my seat, startled by the proximity of the voice. I looked up at Mr. Frederick.

"Mr. Frederick."