We Met In The Shadows.

Flickering Silver

Harry was currently in Lupin’s private office, wand outstretched towards the shadowy form of the fake-Dementor. This was shaping up to be the most exhausting lesson that Harry had ever endured. When one final cry of “Expecto Patronum!” yielded no result except for silvery mist, he finally gave in and let Lupin vanish it instead.

“You don’t have to push yourself so hard, Harry.” Lupin consoled, reaching out a hand to place it on Harry’s shoulder. “The Patronus Charm is notoriously known as one of the most advanced spells to master. Even highly skilled professionals and experienced wizards are unable to do it, and most definitely not within a few weeks.”

Harry slumped against the wall, wiping the sweat off his brow. He had been at this for days, but he just hadn’t been able to produce anything more than some white fog. Lupin had asked him to concentrate on a positive memory, one that brought him great joy, while uttering the incantation ‘Expecto Patronum’.  Although he’d been following the instructions to the best of his abilities, it was surprisingly hard to find a memory that was the ‘happiest’ he’d ever experienced.

“Up now, have some water. Keeping hydrated is essential to all training sessions; it will prevent you from tiring out.” said Lupin, as he conjured a glass and filled it with water for Harry. He gulped down the water and clambered onto his feet, ready to try once more. “I’ll release the Dementor once more. Are you ready?” -a nod from Harry- “Alright then, one, two, three!”

As the Dementor glided out of the closet, bringing that dreaded chill with it, Harry pointed his wand at it, his hand shaking just a little. He chose to pin it on his exhaustion, rather than any lingering apprehension from facing a Dementor.

“Expecto Patronum!” Harry focused all of his energy into the wand, but to no avail. As the Creature ascended towards him, Lupin stepped forward and cast the spell with minimal effort, leading to a flicker of envy in Harry.

“Why can’t I do this, Professor?” asked Harry exasperatedly. He desperately wanted to master the spell so that he could defend himself and wouldn’t have to be so dependent on anyone else. He just couldn’t figure out what mistake he was making.

Lupin hummed, seeming to consider Harry before he spoke, albeit hesitantly. “I know of another method that you could try. However, I will warn you beforehand, not many wizards achieve success with the help of this method either, which is why I tried to teach you via the common method.”

Harry, although intrigued, kept quiet, waiting for Lupin to expand on this ‘other method’.

“Earlier, you were trying to focus on a particular memory, weren’t you? This time, instead of a particular memory, I want you to focus on the feeling itself. What you feel when you ace an exam, or when you win a Quidditch match or when you’re with your friends. It doesn’t matter if it’s not a concrete memory, you just have to feel the emotion viscerally,” he explained, as he stepped back to allow Harry some room for the spell.

What makes me the happiest…? Harry pondered, as he stared at the stone wall in front of him. Abruptly, he remembered that night in the hospital where Daphne and he had spent so long in blissful company. His cheeks heated but he refused to acknowledge that and instead he focused on what he had felt as Daphne had cupped his face. The soft tingling sensation that had spread from where her fingertips had splayed over his cheeks to the calm that had bracketed him. More than joy, he’d felt comfort.

Closing his eyes and grasping onto the echoes of that comfort, Harry completed the wand motion and called out, “Expecto Patronum” in a shockingly steady voice.

Hearing Lupin’s sharp intake, Harry opened his eyes to witness that the sharp mist was visibly stronger and had amassed some sort of shape although not clear enough to tell what it was supposed to be. Moreover, instead of dissipating near instantly, it stayed in form for a good while before slowly drifting apart.