Left With More Than a Memory

Clearing the Air

I live to fight another day, and with another day comes another update. I hope you all enjoy it!

Clearing the Air

The atmosphere of the first time the two had met was almost as awkward as the one now surrounding them as they walked from the great hall. It had been the preparatory staff meeting for the new school year, his first as a professor at Hogwarts. He was the first in the room and she had offered to come in early and set up. As with the majority of the existing staff, the news of Dumbledore hiring a known Death Eater did not sit well with Minerva. More than that, in fact. It was completely and utterly baffling. She had confronted him about it, but he had been unusually vague and avoidant so she'd dropped it. An unfamiliar response from him then, but one that would come to frequent their relationship.

"Mr. Snape?"

A formality, she knew exactly who he was.

"Yes, that's right."

They had known each other in passing as students, classes, quidditch and the like. But they had never been friends or even true acquaintances really. She had heard more about him from others than she knew about him first hand. But from what she saw in their limited interactions, she remembered him as quiet, reserved, and in possession of one of the sharpest minds she had ever encountered. She knew he had gotten mixed up with the wrong crowd at school and still remembered the day she'd read his name among other death eaters in a report of an Order safe house attack. And now here they were, colleagues. She had come far earlier than she needed to and finished her preparations with plenty of time to spare. Knowing that the awkwardness of the encounter ensured any excuse to leave would immediately been seen through as avoidance, she simply sat quietly across from him. The next 15 minutes had been marred with a silence neither of them knew how to fill. Just like the silence that spilled into the highland air as they stepped from the giant castle doors.

The cold night air cut right through the thin material of Minerva's dress, in the shock of the request she had not thought to bring her shawl. A gust of wind blew up around them and she shivered violently. They walked side by side in silence, moving toward a bench a few meters from the castle entrance. As she sat down, Minerva rubbed her arms with her hands in an attempt to warm them up a bit. Severus, still standing, noticed her shivering and he silently took off his outer robes. Without making eye contact he placed them on her shoulders. She, however, followed his every movement with her eyes as he sat down beside her. No words passed between them for a moment. Minerva inhaled deeply, looking towards the sky. The first flakes of a snowfall were illuminated by the torch light.

"I assume you haven't dragged me out into the cold for nothing, Severus"

He silently rose from the bench and walked a little way in front of it, staring into the freezing night.

"It seemed to be the only time I would get when everyone was completely distracted. I wanted an uninterrupted chance to apologise to you".

She sat with the statement for a moment.

"Apologise? she finally asked. "Severus please, I really th-".

"Minerva, I think we have known each other far too long for you to patronise me with undue kindnesses."

"I am not patronising you Severus. I am simply trying to understand you."

"Understand me?!" he said incredulously, raising his voice and turning to face her. "For God's sake Minerva, I murdered the man you clearly-"

"That is a very thin line you have stepped onto professor" she cut in acidly, staring daggers at the man. "Don't you dare attempt to make assumptions about things that you know nothing about"

Severus was taken aback by this sudden sharpness and took a moment to collect himself.

"I murdered a man," he began again very carefully, his calm returning "that you cared a great deal about". He took a deep breath. "And for that I owe you far beyond and apology. But as I stand here and now it is all I have to give you."

"Severus," Minerva replied, her calm equally reinstated. She clutched his robes to her shoulders as she rose. "You and I both know that you owe me nothing of the sort"

Then she saw something she was not at all expecting. A look of complete, genuine, and blatant bewilderment spreading across his face. Puzzled by this, she continued.

"We both know that once Albus Dumbledore got an idea into his head no one could talk him out of it, he was-!"

"Idea, what idea?!" he said suddenly, his eyes darting toward her.

She became annoyed again, his apparent prompting to relive the day she learned of the plan striking deeply. "Severus please don't rub salt into the wound, you know exactly-"

"What idea Minerva!" he shouted, grabbing hold tightly of her arms and almost shaking her.

In that moment, for the first time in her life, Minerva was truly frightened of him. His eyes stared desperately into hers with an unfamiliar wildness, a mania that penetrated straight to her core.

"When he decided you were to kill him" she almost whispered, a tear rolling slowly down her cheek half in fright, half in mourning for the event she relayed.

He kept a hold of her as his eyes widened. "You know? My God, you know?"

His voice had faded to a whisper. After processing what had just happened he seemed to return to himself and, looking down in horror at his tight grip around Minerva's arms, let go of her immediately.

"God, Minerva I haven't hurt you have I? I-I don't know what came over me. I just-"

"Yes I know," she said quietly. "I know Severus".

He took a shuddering breath in. Then, letting his resolve collapse in sheer relief, he embraced her. And Minerva, although shocked, readily reciprocated.

Well, there it is! As always a review would mean the world to me. I hope everyone has a wonderful day/night wherever you are. Take care!