Potions class.

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Morning came painfully slow. 

It took me everything not to fall asleep while reading during the night. I think its going to be another coffee and red bull kind of day today.  

To avoid looking too suspicious, I decided that I'm going to go downstairs into the great hall for breakfast this morning figuring i haven't been down there for ages. 

As i entered the great hall, i could just feel eyes on me. And i know its probably just me being paranoid but i feel as though everyone in that hall knew every little secret and every little thing I've done. The fact that i now didn't actually have anyone to sit with didn't help. 

I walked over to the Gryffindor table, grabbed an apple and then walked back out. I would much rather sit out in the sun anyways rather then sit in a hall where no one likes me nor wanted me there. 

I could feel Lupins eyes on me as i walked out of the room. 

I haven't properly eaten in days, yet i don't feel hungry. The thought of eating food or just the thought of food in general made my stomach churn. 

I sat in the courtyard and started to take small bites out of my apple. I only got 4 bites in before i started to feel nauseas so i put the apple in the bin, grabbed my bag and headed to my first class. 

I only had potions and charms today so easy to avoid Lupin. 

I arrived at my potions class and suddenly realized that I'm still partnered with Harry, Ron and Hermione. SHIT. They're definitely not going to be happy about that...

I reached the table they were sitting at and all three of them looked up. Their glares felt like they were burning through my skin. "Not that I'm happy about this either, but we're still partners on this task. I really don't think Snape would be too happy if we complained about it halfway through our assignment." i stated matter-of-factly.  Both Harry and Ron gave Hermione looks as if to say 'she's right' and they both turned back to look at me, "Fine." Hermione said in a displeased voice and she turned her attention onto the text she had to read for the potion. 

The potion we were in the process of making was called draught of peace. Its said to relive anxiety. A bit ironic for me. I was in the process of trying to stir the potion after adding the powdered moonstone, when Snape called my name from the front of the class. "Miss Clark" he sneered, "role up your sleeves before they end up as part of your ingredients". Everyone was now turned and looking at me. I could feel a hot flush of embarrassment invade my face. Oh no, i cant roll my sleeves up... "Miss Clark i will not ask again" he repeated, getting more agitated. I couldn't do anything, i was frozen to the spot. Unable to move or even respond to Snape. I could feel myself loose control of my breathing. "Okay, for your inability to answer me back and obey my orders, 20 points are deducted from Gryffindor house". You could hear a chorus of groans from other fellow Gryffindor's and a couple of snickers coming from a select group of Slytherins at the back of the classroom. "That wasn't a suggestion for everyone else to stop working unless youse want point deductions too" Snape bellowed and everyone fell silent and got back on with their work. 

I put my head straight back down and tried focusing on the work, but i could still feel everyone's glances at me. Especially Hermione's. 

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After class i ran as quickly as possible out of the doors and to the girls bathroom on the next floor. I felt like i was about to break down right there and then. As soon as i got into the girls bathroom, i rush to the first cubicle, lock myself in, grab the piece of glass out of my bag, unwrapped the bandage on my arm, and with no hesitation, i dragged the sharp object along my arm, hard enough for the blood to be produced straight away. 

I'll look after you                         *Remus lupin comfort ficWhere stories live. Discover now