Growing Pains

Chapter 10: Guilt

Blue's POV

I can't believe Red's gone. And I'm pretty sure it's all my fault. I don't know why, though.

I locked myself in my bedroom, and was staring up at the ceiling, wondering how long it took to starve myself. Not that I was going to though. I would hurt so many people if I even tried.

"Blue..?" Yellow's voice drifts up the stairs. "Where are you..?"

I stayed as silent as possible, as I heard her walk down the hallway. I was in my old room. The one I had on the Stickfight website. Behind those double doors on the second floor was a hallway with rooms. One for each of us. When Second had moved in with us, he had taken the extra one we used for storage.

Yellow's footsteps echoed, I saw a shadow at the bottom of my door.

"Blue..?" Her sweet voice made my heart flutter. I had a huge crush on her for some time now... but I was just too chicken to confess. "Are you in there?"

I opened the door, and I could see worry lines etched into her face. She relaxed once she saw me.

"Hey." I said. "You can come in."

She walked into the room with me, and I shut the door behind us. Not because we were going to do anything(i only wish), but because I didn't want to be bothered by the others. I knew Yellow was going to force the truth out of me, or at least try, and I didn't want to cry in front of Green or TSC.

"Are you okay..?" She asked, and sat down next to me on the bed. And there was the question. God, I really didn't like hiding things, but my thoughts could hurt her... My brain told me to lie, but my gut told me to tell the truth. Which one should I listen to?

"I-I'm fine." I tried to hide the stutter. I'm already toast.

"You're stuttering, Blue."

"And..?"

"I know you too well to pass that off as a random stutter." She frowned. "I know you're lying to me, and it makes me sad to think you don't trust me."

"I do trust you!"

"Then why don't you tell me?"

"T-that's a very good question..."

"Blue...."

"Fine...." I sighed, and Yellow nods. "I've just....been feeling off..."

"How so?" Her voice was soft, filled with concern. Concern for me.

"I don't know... just.. I feel bad."

"Why..?"

"I feel bad for the pain I caused."

"Pain...?" Yellow scooted closer to me, and I'm pretty sure she was preparing to see if I would cry. I did cry often, being the most emotional of the group. The 'pacifist', as well.

"It was all my fault..."

"Blue, I don't understand. Just tell me the truth, and stop with this bullshit. I want to help." She set her hand on my thigh. "Please... let me help you. I don't like seeing you like this..."

I sighed.

"I feel like it's all my fault. The problems with King, all the fights, and now, Red's disappearance..."

"What?!" Yellow said, baffled. "How is all that your fault?"

"If I weren't so addicted to netherwart, we wouldn't have a run in with that witch. And the fights... And all the fights we have here, I feel as if I did something to start them."

"Oh, Blue...."

"And now, with Red..." I could feel tears forming in my eyes. "If I had just stepped in, and talked with her, or paid more attention.... she wouldn't be gone."

Yellow sighed, and looks at me.

"Blue..." She said, "None of those things are your fault... and some of them were bound to happen anyways."

"...What?"

"The fight with King... that would have happened anyways, since Purple would have found us and brought us to the parkour trap anyways, witch or no witch. The fights we get into here are normal. We're friends. We annoy the hell out of each other, it's our job." She chuckled.

"But what about Red...?"

"That was not your fault either! Just because you feel responsible for her, like we all do, doesn't mean that you have to feel bad. She made a choice to leave, and we're going to find her. You don't have to feel bad... Hell, I wasn't even really paying any attention to her either." Yellow smiled, and pulled me into her lap. My face went hot.

"You weren't..?" I mumbled, finding myself comfortable.

"No...." She rubbed my back. "I was too worried about you..."

That's when I lost it, and hot tears ran down my face. I was free of all guilt, and couldn't help but feel so much gratitude for Yellow. God, was she amazing...

"It's going to be alright." She soothed, still rubbing my back. "We're going to get through this..."

I nodded, finding the perfect groove to rest my head on her shoulder. I fit perfectly in her lap, like I was made for it... or it was made for me.
Or maybe I was too hopeful...

God, I really wanted her to like me. Because I liked her.... a lot.

We sat there. We both had dozed off, I was still in her lap. She was warm.... and comfortable. We sat there for maybe hours, but soon a loud bang from outside woke us.

"Oh no..." Yellow said, and got up, dragging me with her towards the source of the noise.

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Hey! Another chapter for y'all! it's kinda short compared to the last two, but whatever. I have bigger events, and longer chapters coming soon! Hope you all have a great day/night, and I hope you enjoyed this chapter!
-Downfall_12

Word Count: 896