Crush

Tension gone

Today is rehab day at Arsenal. So a lot of laying around and some players get treatment. I'm in the physio room getting my calf massaged. The massage is not as good as Leah's massages but I still take it. I'm laying on my stomach with my head on my arms. My eyes are closed and I just try to relax. I think about Leah as always. I'm so embarrassingly obsessed with her. There isn't a time when I don't think about her. I often times think about her body. She just attracts me so much. I feel like my body is exploding with desire every time I see her.

The door of the room opens and Lotte walks in. I was hoping for Leah. Like I always do when a door gets opened. But Lotte has been the only one who isn't constantly accusing me of hurting Leah. She has stayed neutral from the beginning.

"Leah was looking for you." She says at me. I immediately lift my head up. Leah was looking for me.

"Really? Why?" I try to hide my happiness at that fact. I don't want Lotte to get suspicious.

"I don't know. She didn't say anything." Lotte shrugs. Leah probably wanted to make out somewhere and that is why she didn't tell Lotte.

"I'll find her later." I say and try to hold my smile back.

"What are you getting?" Lotte asks.

"Calf massage."

"Me too." She says and lays on the physio bed next to me. I close my eyes again and let my mind go back to my usual daydream about Leah. I think I start to smile. I try to hold it back but it doesn't work.

"What are you dreaming about?" Lotte laughs. Shit. It was too obvious. I open my eyes and get the smile away from my face.

"Umm... nothing specific. I don't know." I say.

"You were smiling pretty hard."

"I was just happy about the rest." I lie. This lie sounds completely stupid.

"Someone you were thinking about?" Lotte asks again. There is also the physio in the room which makes me even more nervous.

"No." I immediately say.

"Okay." Lotte says with a smile. She doesn't believe me. I can see it but at least she doesn't ask anything else. I hope I can hide this for longer. I don't want anyone to find out about me and Leah.

-

After our rest day we are back home in the evening. We had dinner together which I always enjoy. I never had dinner with someone on a regular basis. I like this structure in my life that Leah is giving me.

"My mum will come around tomorrow morning. Is that okay?" Leah asks. I never met her mum before and to be honest I'm scared of it.

"Yeah. She is your mum. She can come around whenever you want her to be here." I say.

"I just wanted to make sure since you never met her." Leah says. I like how thoughtful she is.

"I'm fine." I say again. We will see if I will actually be fine. I hope so. I never met someone's parents. I know Leah has a good relationship with her mum. I want her to like me but I fear that she has also heard things about me. I would get if she wouldn't like me at Leah's side. I wouldn't want my daughter to be with someone like me. But I want to prove that I'm worth it. I want Leah and I will show everyone that I won't hurt her.

Leah went upstairs to do something in her room I think. I stayed downstairs in the kitchen for a bit longer. But soon I start to miss her which is ridiculous considering that she is just upstairs. I make my way upstairs to be with Leah again. I go to her room. She is standing there and is folding some clothes. I step behind her and touch her hips. She jumps up slightly at that touch.