Don't Poke the Bear!

Chapter 36

NO ONE'S EXPECTIN' us to let Bose go, partic'larly in broad daylight, so we check out back and, sure enough, there's no one out there. I tell Bose to leave his hat in the hole. Few folks have seen his face, but his hat's distictive.

"How about I carry my hat?" he says.

I don't blame him. In the same situation, I'd want mine. It's harder to break in a new hat than a new horse. Which reminds me of somethin' I need to tell Bose.

"I can't return your money or your horse. But the two finest horses I ever seen are saddled up and tied to the post behind my store. Pick one and ride off."

"Ain't you worried I'll shoot you?"

"Accordin' to my witch, you can't shoot nothin' in Kansas. And I believe her. Before you climb out, pick up all them bullets you dropped and hand 'em to me."

When all the bullets are accounted for, Wing drops the bucket in the hole. Bose turns it upside down, stands on it, and climbs out of the jail hole.

"I appreciate you doin' this for me," he says. "I won't forget it. You and me are square after his." He winks one of those god-awful eyes at me, and I nod.

"I'm glad to hear that, Bose."

"You've got my word," he says.

"That means a lot."

I still can't get over his voice. So special is it, if he told me to go to hell, I'd actually look forward to the trip.

"When you walk out of here, move slowly," I say, "so as not to draw any attention to yourself."

Bose hesitates at the back door, looks around, and walks out. He chooses one of the horses, climbes on its back, and heads away, at a steady walk.

Rose, Wing and I sit at the kitchen table. We aim to give Bose enough time to make a clean getaway, so Wing and I fill the time by checkin' our guns and ammunition. Suddenly, I hear four clicks behind me, and turn to see Bose Rennick aimin' a gun at my back. He grins and says, "Can't blame a guy for tryin'!" Then he says to Rose, "Last chance to come with me, Sugar Britches!"

From somewhere-who knows where-Rose flings two rats at Bose. He fires two clicks that no doubt would a' hit both of 'em in mid air, had the bullets worked.

Wing lifts his shotgun and cocks one of the barrels, and Bose takes off.

Then I say to Rose, "Sugar Britches, are you certain Bose is part of my destiny?"

Wing laughs out loud. Rose says, "I know it's hard to believe, but yes. And Emmett?"

"Yeah?"

"If you call me Sugar Britches again, you'll wish you hadn't."

"Okay. Sorry."

She looks at Wing, implyin' the same thing. He nods and mutters somethin' in Chinese that makes Rose's eyes go wide. When Rose answers him in Chinese, Wing's eyes grow twice as wide. He jumps on the floor and lays himself full-length, face down, while shakin' all his limbs and makin' all sorts of babblin' sounds.

"What's he doin'?" I say.

"Begging my forgiveness for what he just said about me."

"In Chinese?"

"Mandarin."

"Can you let him up? I'm sure he didn't mean it."

"He meant it all right."

"How bad could it be?"

"We don't have words for it in English."

"Wing! Why would you speak like that to Rose?"

"I not know she understand. I act brave. In my culture woman not speak down to man. Not mean what I say."

I look at Rose. "We got more important things to do."

She says somethin' to him in Chinese or Mandarin or whatever the hell they speak. He says somethin' back, gets up, says somethin' else, and bows deeply to Rose. She says somethin' else, and he nods and runs out the back door to the out house.

"Is everythin' worked out?" I say.

"Yes."

"Then why's he so upset?"

"I forgave him, but told him to sleep alone tonight, and have a large bucket of water handy."

"Why?"

"Because at some point in the middle of the night, his private parts are going to burst into flames."

"You'd do that?"

"Of course not. But he will."

"I don't understand."

"I plant the seed. His mind does the rest."

"So when his privates burst into flame it's all in his mind?"

"Yes."

"So it's not really happening?"

"Of course it's happening! It's just happening in his mind."

She sees I'm confused, and adds, "That's where all the real things happen, Emmett. It's where the pain is."

"In the mind?"

"Exactly."

"What about Bose?"

"What about him?"

"How long is the spell on him gonna last?"

"What spell?"

For the hundredth time since I've known Rose, I find myself wonderin' how much I know and how much I dreamt about somethin' that just happened. I wonder if somethin' happened, or nothin' happened, or if whatever happened was only in my mind. I give up wonderin' about it, and go to the back door to whistle the sound a wood warbler makes. When Shrug shows up I ask him how he's feelin'. He hits his hurt shoulder and grins. Then winks at Rose, and she gives him some sort of secret smile.

To Shrug I say, "If you're willin', I'd like to lock you in my jail hole."

Shrug shuffles to the jail hole, looks down into it a second, then hops in.

I stand over him and look down. "You need anythin'?"

He shakes his head.

A very shaken and humbled Wing Ding comes back inside and helps me lock both of the wooden doors above Shrug's head. Then I get one of the chairs, put it on top of the hinged floorboards, and have Wing sit there, holdin' his shotgun.

Then Rose, Gentry, and I go back into the main room, where I see a line of people at the far side near the quiet table, waitin' to talk to the Sheriff.

Rose says, "I'll move my things into Wayne's room."

Gentry says, "I'll tend bar awhile."

I kiss Gentry and head over to my sheriffin' table.