Skates Out // a Luis Mendoza Fan Fic

29. Spilling secrets

Luis. 

I was so fucked. And not in a funny way, I mean seriously, seriously, fucked. This thing with JJ was getting way out of hand, my little crush on her was turning into something a lot bigger, something I didn't know how to handle. And it was messing with my game. 

"Mendoza!" Charlie barked furiously, "you're done until you can pull yourself together, you've been a mess today. Totally useless."

I would have held it against him if he hadn't been so totally right, I had been sloppy today and I needed to get off the ice before I did something really embarassing. 

I nodded practically flinging myself over the barrier in my haste to get off the ice, I needed a fucking reality check and quickly. I walked up into the cafe above the rink hoping to get some quiet but there was no such luck. 

Right in the middle JJ was sitting by herself studying some kind of notebook and before I could stop myself my legs were carrying me over to her. "What are you doing?" I asked sitting down next to her. 

I could see her search the cafe for Igor and then the surprise flash through her eyes when she didn't spot him, "um, nothing really. What are you doing?"

At least I could always count on her to humble me. "Sitting down, is that a crime?" 

"No." JJ replied slowly, she looked like she was considering whether to snap at me or not care, "I guess not. How come you finished practice early?" 

Not caring then, I couldn't tell if that was a good sign or a bad one. "Because I've been fucking up all day." I told her surprising myself, it wasn't exactly something I wanted to admit. 

She sighed, "yeah me too. Ida sent me out of the gym because I was so out of focus." 

It sounded too good to be true but I wasn't delusional enough to get my hopes up that we were unconcentrated for the same reason, "why?" 

JJ pursed her lips, I could tell she was thinking carefully about whether I was worth telling or not. Everything was so calculated with her. She switched her attention back to me, "can you keep a secret?" 

Fuck me, I would keep all her secrets if she let me, I wanted to keep all her secrets. I nodded, "yeah." 

JJ narrowed her eyes at me, "you can't even tell Banks or Charlie. This stays between us. Well us Elsa and Viola." 

I might not have been the only one in on it but I would take it, Viola was her best friend and Elsa- well I didn't really know what kind of relationship the two of them had but it was close, so really it was a win for me. "I know, I won't say anything I promise." 

She nodded before exhaling deeply and saying, "I'm actually adopted." 

I frowned a bit confused about why this would be such a big secret, "and you didn't know before or-." 

JJ cut me off when she realised I didn't understand, "my real father is Oliver Aspen." 

I choked on my spit, "you're messing with me right now aren't you?" 

"No." JJ replied, "I'm dead serious." 

"Fuck." I muttered trying to keep my shock to a minimum she didn't seem like the kind who would appreciate a spectacle. 

"Tell me about it." She muttered shaking her head. 

"Does he know?" I asked her. 

JJ nodded, "yeah that was the whole wrong sister drama in the office. He didn't know he had two daughters and got Jess confused with me because they broke into her room instead of mine." 

"Really?" I asked before I could help myself. I mean I know they looked creepily similar but I would have been able to tell them apart from a mile away and I'd seen them side by side. Jess was pretty but JJ fucking glowed. 

She shot me an incredulous look, "yes really. If you hadn't noticed we look quite similar." 

I brushed if off quickly, "yeah I don't know where I was going with that. I guess it kind of is an easy mistake." Liar.

She rolled her eyes turning back to the notebook, while I silently kicked myself for acting like such a massive weirdo. 

JJ.

I couldn't believe I was telling him this, I'd barely managed to tell Viola and Elsa, but for some reason with him it had just come right out. I was getting a little too comfortable for comfort around this boy. I was just glad he hadn't made a big deal about it. The last thing I needed now was a pity parade, I couldn't stand that sort of thing. I remembered when jess had first disappeared everyone made such a show of feeling sorry for me and I hated it.

And easy mistake? Easy mistake?! Jess and I might have looked very similar but we weren't identical twins. I would have expected him to at least be able to tell the diffrence between me and my sister. He might just have been my fake boyfriend but it still pissed me off. Fucking asshole. 

I snatched my book up slamming it shut and pushing off my chair. "Where are you going?" Mendoza asked confused as I started storming away. 

"Away from you." I snapped suddenly enraged. How could he be so blind and stupid?

"What did I do?" I heard him call after me still annoyingly confused. Confused enough that I knew I was making an embarrassingly big deal out of nothing since he couldn't even figure out what I considered to be obvious. 

I ignored the question, it was better not to tell him why because it would make me look like an idiot for caring about something so insignificant. I'd already screwed up at the gym today because I couldn't keep focus with all of this new information in my head I didn't need more to fixate about. 

Nice job Mendoza, I thought bitterly as I marched into the girls locker room. 

The only thing that would help now was skating. It made all the thoughts and clutter in my mind disappear when I got overwhelmed and thankfully the ducks were getting off the ice as I walked out fully kitted up. I seriously needed a break.