redamancy

IX.

The rays of the sun streamed into the room through the small slit the curtains had so sneakily revealed. The light struck me right in the face; much to my dismay I was forced to open my eyes.

I rubbed my eyes, as I sat up admiring the mess of clothes that covered the floor. Last night was all too wonderful -- yet all too short. If only I could go back.

Her dark locks cascaded down to the small of her back while her eyes revealed the passion she had for me, I had technically been her first time.

Maybe our encounter could be used as a practice round; a round of practice she would refer to before she would make love to her husband.

Stupid fuck.

The sun persisted in rising, so I made myself stand. Mina was nowhere in sight. I figured she must be at her own wedding; making it acceptable for me to leave and go cry about the love of my life getting married.

I dressed myself quickly and left the room with all my belongings. I walked down the steps, hanging my head in shame and thought to myself about how those memories I had would bring me pain in the near future.

I'd never felt a feeling so painful like this; heartbreak felt worse than getting a gash in the leg (which I had once had.)

I just hoped it would be over quickly.

_   _   _

I sat in my room, listening to the rain hit against the sturdy glass. A cup of chamomile tea in my right hand, a small bottle of whiskey in my left.

The whiskey; to take away the thought of her.

The tea; to relax my senses.

It was so quiet in the room you could practically hear a pin drop.

I had no desire in tuning into the mid-day radio programs like I used to, I had no desire in moving, I didn't even have desire in breathing; God could strike me dead and I would, in that moment, be joyful.

I hated the fact, I could let myself leave her in that awful camp knowing I could possibly not see her again; I hated knowing that when I was absent there was another taking my place. I hated it even more that all I was -- was a piece of ass.

I sighed deeply letting the emotions overcome me. I was upset, but oddly enough I didn't feel like crying or punching a wall like I assumed I'd want to do. I just sat on my bed and sulked.

I had sat on my bed for exactly three hours and sulked; that is, until I heard a noise coming from down the stairs.

I got off of my bed slowly and walked into the hallway; padding down the stairs and over to the door.

At first I was hesitant to open the door because I assumed it was my next door neighbor Frances who always asked me if I had seen her dog -- Rufus, but then I decided against ignoring what I assumed to be was Frances and sluggishly opened the door.

"Frances if you ask me where that damn dog is again I swear- Mina?"

I felt my heartbeat immediately rise when I saw her beautiful coffee colored irises meet my own.

"I'm such a stupid, indecisive, brat who is totally off her shit, but I realized- standing there in front of the altar with a man I had no feelings for opened my eyes. . ." She began, as she switched her vision between my tall frame and the damp sidewalk. "Justin I thought about you everyday that passed after you left while I was in that awful camp, I thought about your hugs and the way you snuck out to see me with Nate, the way your lips felt against my own last night, the way you always made me smile and laugh, the way you always treated me like I was a princess in this big world- even when I was in the rehabilitation camp you made me feel special. . .I love you for all of those things and I knew I couldn't get married to Daniel, so I ran out of the church and ran all the way here in the pouring rain in my wedding dress to tell you how I feel about you and I have no shame."

I was shocked, I was so shocked I had to process everything she just said; leaving her there to await my answer, but what was my answer?

"Mina I-"

"You?" She bit her lip, eyeing me closely.

"I have felt this burning desire for you ever since that night at the camp, I have longed for your love for a long time and I don't want to think right now because my head hurts, but I wanted to go on a walk and I would like you to accompany me, can you hold this for me?" I replied while I stuck out my hand and smiled at her.

"Okay." She blushed.

"Okay." I answered.

And in that moment. . . I became her only one and she became my favorite being.

THE END.

//

THERE IS STILL AN EPILOGUE WHICH WILL BE POSTED THIS WEEKEND AND THEN THATS THE LAST FOR REDAMANCY *wipes tears*
until then all the love xoxo
-veronica