Lost Without You (AOTC)

Seventh

"Oh, Ani," Padmé says, running her fingers through my hair. I lay on my bed back at the Villa, facedown with my head buried in my arms. Tears stream slowly from my eyes as I blink them away.

"Why did she have to die?" I mumble into my arms.

"Everyone dies at one point in their life. It's a natural part of life," Padmé says.

I grumble and turn over, facing the ceiling and taking a deep breath. "I will be able to stop people from dying. When you're dying I will have the power to save you," I say, sitting up.

"Anakin, don't say things like that! I don't want to live forever. I will live my life well."

"You won't when Clovis is married to you," I mumble, and she looks away as soon as I meet eyes with her.

"He's not that bad," she says. "I mean..."

"Exactly. He is that bad."

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Padmé loves me, but the bad thing is... she can't do anything to stop the wedding with Clovis from happening.

The battle of Geonosis is over. My arm got sliced off by the lightsaber of Count Dooku, so that's always great. Padmé now has three diagonal scars across her back.

I can't used to this mechanical arm. I can't stand it. I toss and turn in my bed back at Padmé's parents' house just because of it, and my new arm hits something warm. I squint in the darkness, and I see Padmé.

"What are you doing in here?" I ask. She wraps her arms around me and cries into my arm. Crying isn't like her. "What's wrong?"

"Anakin, I can't marry Clovis! I'll do anything to call off the wedding, I --"

"Calm down. Here, it's alright." I wrap one hand around her thigh, and the other around her arm and I pull her into my lap. She curls up against my chest, shuddering.

"Ani. I'm so mad at myself for--"

"Shh. It's okay. Everything's going to be alright."

Soon, the sharp breaths she takes and sobs are diminished as she falls asleep in my lap. I kiss her temple and decide to let her sleep there instead of taking her to her room. What could happen?

The night went by fast. I didn't toss and turn, or even really move. I just fell asleep with Padmé in my lap, sitting up, leaning against the bed's headboard.

It's nice to sleep in once you have been battling and moving from place to place. Though I don't think we'll be able to sleep in this morning considering we just got back to Padmé's parents' house from Geonosis, and Ryoo and Pooja have been patiently awaiting to play with us.

Sure enough, they come running in my room, but I quickly notice one thing: Padmé's with me. And she's beside me on my bed. I quickly form an excuse in my head as I take her out of my lap and set her on the bed next to me.

Ryoo gasps. "Anakin, why is Auntie Padmé in here sleeping?"

"She fell asleep in here last night. She had a nightmare," I say truthfully. Well, it wasn't really a nightmare. It was more like a sudden realization.

"Why?"

"She... needed someone to comfort her. I couldn't put her back in her room because she fell asleep..." I try not to make it sound too awkward. I just wish she never fell asleep in here last night. It looks bad, even though nothing happened. I got myself into this mess and now I have to get myself out! "On me, so I couldn't move?" I offer.

"Oh."

"Yeah. Well, I have to..." I look at Padmé, still sleeping peacefully next to me. "Never mind."

"Come play!" Pooja pleads, getting down on her knees.

"Oh, alright," I say, standing up. I look around me to pull on my cloak or something, but I see Padmé wrapped up in it and I remember last night she had it on. I just grab a robe out of the closet and pull it on instead.

Pooja and Ryoo run out ahead of me, and right before I walk out the door, Padmé calls, "Ani?"

I smile and kneel beside her. "Good afternoon, Angel."

"Afternoon?"

"I'm kidding. It's getting late, come downstairs for breakfast?"

She nods. "Sure."

I help her up, and she stops to look into my eyes. She holds my mechanical hand, but I quickly pull it away. "Stop," I say. "I hate this hand. Don't make it anymore obvious than it is that it's there."

"Anakin. It's not that bad." Padmé takes it and presses one of the fingertips to her lips. Instantly my senses pick up warmth and a soft smoothness. The feeling that it gives me seems more exaggerated than usual.

I wrap my mechanical hand around the back of her neck, and she looks at me, her brown eyes intense. I start to kiss her slowly. She kisses me back. Before we know it, we hear little footsteps padding against the carpet, up the stairs.

We both pull away reluctantly, stepping away from each other. "Ani," Padmé whispers. "Mm?" I reply, the slightest bit dazed. She opens her mouth, but doesn't have time to reply, because Ryoo and Pooja push me down onto the bed and start screaming in my ear, "Breakfast is ready! Breakfast is ready!"

"Okay, okay," I say, standing up slowly. "You don't have to scream."

Padmé casts a sad glance at me from under the doorframe. I know what she's thinking. And she probably knows what I am, too.