Lost Without You (AOTC)

Eighth

"Anakin, you need to come back."

I argue with Obi-Wan over our comlinks this morning after Ryoo, Pooja and I all played in the gardens.

"Master, I can't! Senator..." Padmé needs me, I think. "I mean..."

"Anakin, if you... fine! You have another week. That's it. If you beg to stay longer once more, you will receive consequences that you will regret asking for. Do you hear me?"

"Yes, Master."

"Good. That should give you time to recover from your injury."

"Thank you, Master."

"Sure. Goodbye. Contact me if slash when you need me."

"Yes, Master." I dismiss the call and lie back on my bed, sighing in relief.

***********************************

"Ani, wake up, baby." I open my eyes slowly and squint at the source of the voice, who ends up being Padmé, hovering over me with a big smile on her face.

"What time is it?" I ask, pulling her on top of me. She smacks my chest playfully and rolls me over next to her.

"Oh, it's only..." She rolls her head over to look at me and smiles. "17:45."

"What?! I slept for two hours?! Why did you let me?"

"Because you were so adorable when you were sleeping! No, I'm kidding. I just... I don't know. I thought you were tired, so I just let you be. I didn't want you to be grumpy with me for waking you." Padmé laughs, and I laugh with her.

"Very funny," I say slowly, pulling her up off the bed to stand. I kiss her once. I try to pull away, but Padmé holds on, kissing me and kissing me. "Stop," I mumble in between kisses. "I don't want to let you go," she breathes. Another kiss. "I love you."

I reluctantly push her away gently and shake my head. She looks at me, very concerned. "Ani, what are you doing?"

"We can't. No. You have a wedding coming up."

"What?" I can already see she's on the verge of tears. "I thought you said you loved me! That we could keep it a secret, that we could --"

I blink tears out of my eyes and look away. "It just can't be... we can't. You're cheating on your fiancée." I taste bile in my mouth, but I swallow it back down. I don't know what's come over me, but suddenly I'm concerned about our relationship. I'm afraid, like I never was before, that we won't be able to keep it a secret. "You were the one who said we would be living a lie if we kept our love a secret!"

"Anakin, what had come over you? This isn't you! This isn't my Ani!"

"I... I'm sorry," I whisper.

"No! No, Anakin! What about our love? What about us?"

I dare to look at her, and instantly I regret it. Her beauty and the woman she is overcomes me, and I can't do it anymore. I can't deny my love for her. But I have to.

"Our love is no more. Our love is not possible." I call Obi-Wan. "Master. I'm coming home early."