My Brother's Best Friend ( A Luke Hemmings Fanfic )

Chapter 13

Warning: Story May Include Self-Harm Triggers

After Luke let go, it was slightly awkward for me. When we leave the room, we go in two separate directions, which just reminds me how I've messed everything up. Throughout the night I just get more and more depressed.

Lizzy had left right after lunch because she has family dinner. I feel so alone and nobody can help me. I turn to the only thing I have left. 

I pull my box of blades out and sigh heavily. It's the only relief, but I don't want this to be me. By now, I'm past the point of caring, though. I drag the blade across my wrist 21 times. Once for each year of Ashton's life I've fucked up. 

I know the boys are probably downstairs playing video games, so I sit here with bleeding wrists, about to cry. I'm starting to see black spots when I hear loud footsteps. I quickly shove my box of blades under my pillow, then slip on a sweatshirt.

I'm having trouble breathing, but try to cover it up as Michael walks into the room. 

"Hey Syd. I was just wondering if you want to come play FIFA with us." He smiles. 

"Hey Mikey. I was just wondering if you could possibly learn how to KNOCK!!" I smirk when he glares at me.

"I didn't want to have to do this, but..." He picks me, running down the stairs towards the backdoor. 

I'm laughing and screaming which draws all the boys' attention. All I see outside is the dark sky before I plunge into the pool. 

The chlorine stings my open cuts, causing me to scream as I hit the water. The boys laugh, thinking I'm just freaking out because I got my hair wet, or some other dumb shit most girls worry about. 

Michael holds out a hand to help me out, but I have different ideas. I take his hand and yank him in. Calum tries to help Michael out, but Michael pulls him in. I grab Luke and Ashton's legs and just yank them in. 

Their faces are priceless!! I giggle and try to keep my arms above the water. Then Luke dunks me, and I come up wincing.

"Syd, what's wrong?" He looks at me concerned.

I put on a fake smile and answer, "I'm ok. There's no problem!!" He obviously buys it because he smirks and dunks me again.

It makes me think of depression. Right when you get up, it just pushes you under again. It also makes me realize I can never be normal. I'll always be hurt by chlorine, only pretending to be happy, and I'll always be depressed. 

That's when I pass out.

A.N.  Hi guys!!  I know I haven't written in a while and I'm sorry. I've just had a hard time coming up with ideas, and finding time to write. I'm hoping I'll be able to keep writing at least once a week, but no promises. 

I know this chapter was a bit depressing, and I'm sorry. But sometimes things have to be sad before the joy comes.

I hope you liked it!! I'm also going to have Luke and Sydney's relationship grow more in the next few chapters. 

I love you my beautiful penguins!!

Enjoy!!