Unbelievable - Larry Stylinson Fanfic

Chapter 13

I'm dedicating this chapter to @sa5mmch27 because her comment made me cry from laughing so hard... so thanks for that. ;)

A/N

I'm gonna try to keep up this weekly update so...

Here ya go. ;)

Chapter 13

***AGAIN, BE ADVISED***

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[I have NO hate towards Eleanor]

Louis' POV

I opened my eyes and panicked.  It was Harry.  Harry's the person whose lips had met mine.  So I did what any rational person would do; I ran like hell.

I bolted out of the mall and got into the first cab I saw.  I needed to put distance between Harry and I.  I needed to stay away from him.  I can't feel anything towards him... I don't want to.  I can't.  Eleanor said no one would ever love me, that I was worthless.  Harry deserves better than me.  So I can't feel towards him.  I have to just stay away from him until this blows over.  That sounds easy enough.

**TRIGGER WARNING**

When I got to my shared flat, I went straight to my bathroom and searched for a shiny piece of metal.  I sighed in relief as I reached behind the toilet paper holder and my hand grazed my cold, sharp razor.  I felt myself sit on the edge of the tub and subconsciously roll up my sleeves; something I'd found myself doing a lot lately.

I looked into the razor and gazed at my reflection.  Just then I realized how much self-hatred I have for myself.  I hate who I am, and I pity whoever likes me.  I can't live up to their expectations, because I'm a let down.  I twisted the razor between my fingers, contemplating on whether I should cut or not.  If someone were to find out, they would have pity on me... and that's the last thing I want.  The only one that should feel sorry for me is myself.  I felt a tear roll down my cheek and felt pathetic.  So fucking pathetic.

I grazed my thumb over the edge lightly and made up my mind.  I gently put pressure onto my skin until I felt the familiar stinging.  I let out my breath that I didn't know I was holding and cut a single line across my wrist.  I stared in awe at the scarlet liquid that was dripping down my arm.  I cut a few other lines on my left arm and felt my self hatred melt away slowly until I was left with a blank mind.  I put the razor into my left hand and repeatedly drug lines through my right wrist as well.  I smiled to myself, but I'm sure it wasn't a happy one.  

I heard someone yell my name, but I was too caught up in my razor to really notice.  I felt someone run through the door, but it still never clicked.  I heard someone gasp in shock.  I looked up at this person, and noticed it was Harry... and that he looked hurt.  Then I finally caught on.  He was staring down at my arms, and I looked down as well.  They were covered in blood, and I'm sure it looked horrible to him.  I felt all the emotions that I had tried to get rid of come back, plus added on guilt.  I didn't want him to know... I didn't want anyone to know.  I looked up to him and watched as his eyes settled on mine.  I noticed that they were full of tears, and he looked heart broken.  

I heard him take in a deep breath.  "W-what did I do? Louis...... w-why?"  His voice cracked, and the raw emotion in his voice made me loose mine.  I opened my mouth to speak but nothing would come out.  I shook my head, rolled my sleeves down, and stood up.  I pushed past him and ran out of the bathroom, well I tried to.  Before I could get away, he grabbed my shirt and tugged me back.  He just stood there looking at me with a worried expression.  Suddenly, he wrapped his arms around my waist and hugged me tight.  I could feel his breath tickle the back of my neck, and felt myself relax a little and wrapped my arms around his neck.  We stood there in silence, just embracing one another until he spoke up.