aries: "i don't mess with no heroin, but i love me some candy."
taurus: "it ain't just an ice cream, it's a king cone."
gemini: "this ain't the fucking help, bitch."
cancer: "i'm president of the tv, and you can't do nothing about it."
leo: "like I'm fuckin' beyonce in a yacht in st. tropez."
virgo: "why the hell would I leave the library? it's the best job here!"
libra: "girl, stop being a bitch-ass bitch."
scorpio: "see, they meant 'you're', apostrophe r-e. as in, you're gonna die."
sagittarius: "so i'm sitting here, with barbecue sauce on my titties, and i'm all like what the fuck, again?"
capricorn: "that's bullshit, shit to the bull."
aquarius: "don't be fuckin' with harry potter."
pisces: "the world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean place.
