Sinking

vanish

Phil didn't show up to school the next day. Or the day after. Or even the day after that. Or the next one.

There was absolutely no sign of him at all. A car never came out of his garage. The blinds to his windows stayed drawn shut. I didn't even see any lights on inside the house, which got me wondering if he was even home at all.

Even people at school were beginning to worry, which said something, because no one at school ever cared about how other people were doing. I noticed the anxiety spreading across the features of his friends, such as Chris, Felix, and Marzia. I noticed how Tyler, Zoe, and Louise often walked together, and I could hear the worried whispers of his name. I noticed Troye, Connor, and Caspar, and even Joe letting their eyes roam to the empty spots in the halls where he would normally be. I noticed those who he barely spoke to, such as Marcus, Alfie, Tanya; even they spoke to the others about him. I noticed how it was spreading, how friends talked to friends.

I noticed everything, but I said nothing.

Time went by quickly when Phil's presence wasn't here to make my conscious mind slow down. The week consisted of me waking up and going to school, ignoring jokes made at my back, and then going to work until I went home to eat a gross, late dinner with Adrian. Not only was Phil gone, but I hadn't spoken to my mother since that night she got fired. I didn't even know if she knew I had a job now.

I hadn't worked on Tuesday or Wednesday, however, so on those days I'd gone home and been greeted by Adrian and Susie. Then I'd stand at my window and paint, my eyes flickering ever so slightly over to the closed window across the way every few minutes.

Thursday and Friday had been uneventful, just like Saturday and Sunday. On Monday I couldn't help but hope to see Phil standing at the edge of his driveway when I left my house for school, but he wasn't there.

There was a small part of me that felt angry. Phil Lester, the boy who ignored me for years; suddenly one day he talks to me, and the next day, he decides to vanish.

He made me think I finally had a chance at having a friend. But that just added to the list of the many disappointments in my life. I didn't know when, or if, he was coming back. I didn't know if he'd left town or if he was still inside his house only fifty feet away. I didn't know what he was doing, and I didn't know why he was plaguing my thoughts like a disease when I was sure I was not present in his at all.

I knew nothing, and it was that thought that made me feel helpless and alone.

On Tuesday morning, a week after my first day at my new job and a week after Phil had disappeared, I exited my house, once again wearing a black sweater with black jeans and my torn up black converse. The air outside was stuffy and damp, so I knew that it would most likely be raining by the time school was over.

I looked over at Phil's house as I walked down the pavement, and everything was how it had been each day for the last week. Quiet, still, empty. I let out a sigh and pursed my lips, tearing my gaze away from the house and instead focusing on the school building.

I made it to school on time, luckily, and Mrs. Anzo was still our substitute teacher. She was a lot nicer to me than any other adult in the building, so that was nice.

The rest of the day was, once again, uneventful, just like my entire life seemed to be. Most of me liked the fact that nothing crazy happened to me ever, but there was still a part that just itched for something... more. I knew that I was destined to live an extremely ordinary dull life, however.

Soon enough it was once again time for art class, and I was glad because that meant I could finally get this weird on-edge feeling to go away.

I kept my head down, as usual, eyes trained on my frayed shoelaces dragging across the tile, bitten nails digging into the fabric of the strap of my bag. I was early, considering I hadn't made any stops between this class and the last.