How it all began

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A/N: picture above is Alexandria

My name is Alexandria Rose Sky. I'm 17 years old with long blonde hair and bright green eyes. I am quiet and like to stay to myself. Even the nurses don't go near me unless they have to. I can hear them talking in the halls to each other as if I'm not behind the door they're standing in front of. Did I mention that I'm being forced to live in a special facility for troubled teens? Everyone here has a different problem. To name a few some are anorexic, abused or raped, and some are just plain out psychotic. There are plenty more than the ones I've named. Although these are the common reasons you hear about from the others that are stuck here too. Like me I'm in here because something is wrong with me. Yet I believe nothing is wrong with  me. Something's wrong with them for not believing me. I'm in here, well, because I'm suicidal. I used to cut myself everyday just to get a release. 

I have had such a horrible life that no one understands. They all think I'm doing this for attention. Well they're wrong. I'm doing it so I can die already and get away from my so called "family." You see when I was ten my father died in a car accident on his way home from work. He was my best friend and the only person I felt who truly understood me. After my mom got the phone call telling her what happened, she lost it. A few days after my dads funeral she stopped talking to me and began to drink away her problems. All it took was a month of this and she turned violent and ritually started to beat me everyday. She would always say, after every punch, kick or whatever it was she threw my way, that it was my fault that he's gone. Mom made sure that I knew it was my fault that dad died.

After two years of drinking, beating me and making sure she made my life a living hell, Mom remarried and had another child. It was a boy and they named him Christopher James Vincent after my dad. She said that way he would still be there with her. Now I bet you're thinking that it's good she moved on, well its not her husband is worse than her. He hits both of us all the time, but she still stays with him.

Two months after I turned fifteen he came home drunk one night. I was the only one home since my mom was at work and my brother was with the neighbors for the night. I tried to get away from him. I knew how he was when he was drunk (he's worse than when he's is sober) but he got a hold of me and beat me so badly I couldn't stand. I can remember everything he did, every word he said. Since that night I have been afraid it would happen again. I was afraid he would do much worse. Right before my sixteenth birthday I couldn't take anymore of the constant bullying and beatings from my parents. I gave up and tried to kill myself. My mom found me and called 911 in hysterics. I don't remember much after that because I passed out due to blood loss, but when I woke up the doctors explained everything and asked why I did what I did. I told them why I did it but they didn't believe me so they sent me here.

I am sitting in my empty room staring at the ceiling and laying on the floor. I could feel my chest tightening at the memories. I knew what was happening, I was having a panic attack. This was the fifth one this week. They refuse to let anyone share a room with me. They think I'll make them worse. I listen as the nurses run into the room and try to move me and get me to speak but I can't. All I can do is scream and cry out as the memories flood through my mind.

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