Lust And Love (Lauren / You)

Chapter 26

(Your POV)

I eat my burger, not saying a word as everyone chit chat's. I realized something, I can't be myself. Because I'm depressed. But I can try, right? Lauren has also been quiet, just silently eating.

"How'd you meet Stella, Y/N?" Ally asks, making me put my burger down. I wipe my mouth with my napkin before speaking.

"Today Keith and I went to the arcade," I speak. "And I was playing Dance Dance Revolution, and in the middle of the song, Stella joined in and we tied. So we got to talking and here we are now."

"Tied? But you're one hell of a dancer!" Normani exclaims.

"And so is Stella, but she likes to draw more." I mumble, taking a sip of my tea.

"Just like Lauren!" Camila exclaims. Okay, so my sister has an on and off filter. Sometimes she thinks before she speaks, and other times she doesn't. And this is one of the times where she doesn't think. It goes quiet as Lauren's head snaps up. "Oh..right."

I stare at my food, now not hungry. I push the plate away.

"Nice going, Camila." Riley says, rolling her eyes.

"Oh shut it, Riley." Dinah snaps at her.

"Hey now, guys calm down." Ally tries to. All of a sudden, an argument breaks out. I hear my name, Lauren's name and so many other things. I look at Stella, who is awkwardly eating, along with Lauren.

I sigh and stand up, nobody noticing as I walk out of the building. Since Keith drove us here, I don't have the keys and our house is too far to walk too, I simply sit on the curve.

Lauren and I's break up is effecting the group. They're arguing because of our break up, and I can't do anything about it. I see shoes next to me, specifically Lauren's shoes. How do I know? Because she wears those damn shoes everyday.

None of us say a word, just silence surrounding us and the occasional sound of cars passing by. I play with my thumbs, looking off into the distance. What am I suppose to say to Lauren? 'Hi'? No, there's more to be said.

Out of nowhere, I turn and hug Lauren. I wrap my arms around her and hug her. I just need to feel her, touch her and smell her. It may sound weird, but it's true. She makes me feel like home. Lauren hesitates and hugs me back.

"S-sorry," I stammer. "I just needed that." I pull away, turning back.

"It's okay, I needed that too." She whispers. I feel her eyes boring into my head, but I ignore the stare. "Y/N, can we uh, talk?"

"We're talking right now, aren't we?" I ask, finally meeting her eyes. Lauren gives a small smile, but it falters when she sees how tired I look. "But honestly, Lauren, there's nothing to talk about. You used me." A tear slides down my cheek.

"No-no-no," Lauren mummers, "It's not like that."

"Then what's it like, Lauren? Huh? Because I specifically remember you saying that you're confused. I'm an experiment." I shrug, shedding a few more tears.

"No-uh, Y/N. I'm not confused anymore!" She exclaims, fully turn toward me now. "I choose you, Y/N."

I shake my head, standing up. "Prove it, Lauren."

~~~

I lay in my bed, my arm over my eyes. Stella left me her number and went home. She said she couldn't wait to tell her sister that she met us and Fifth Harmony. All though we had a big ass argument and it wasn't my fault, I apologized to her. She understood and said she'd call me.

As for the Lauren situation? I walked away and waited by the car, leaving her to think. Do I know what she's going to do? No.

A knock is at my door.

"Come in." I mumble. The door opens, so I take my arm off of my eyes. I look to see Camila and Ally. I sit up, my back now against the headboard. "What's up?"

"I just wanted to apologized," Camila sighs, sitting on the edge of my bed. "For the argument earlier at Red Robin. I basically started it."

I shake my head, "It's fine, if anything, Riley started it. And don't apologize, I talked to Lauren."

Ally pipes in, "Really? What'd she say?"

"She said she chose me and blah blah blah." I say in casual voice.

"And? Isn't that what you wanted to hear?" Camila asks, confused.

"Oh, yeah of course." I shrug. "But what I also wanted to hear was an, 'I'm sorry', which I didn't hear. So, I said, prove it and walked away."

"Oh," Ally frowns. "I would've thought she'd apologize, but knowing Lauren, she'll come up with something."

I shrug, pulling my knees to my chest.

"To be completely honest, I would've settled with an 'I'm sorry' and forgave her, but she didn't. She didn't say it. I saw how tired and miserable she looked, and that's what I feel like too, but she didn't apologize."

~~~

I sit on the couch in between Camila and Ally. I eat out of the tub of Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream.

"Want some?" I ask Camila. She shakes her head, letting me eat.

"Dawgs turn the TV on! Lauren is on it!" Dinah exclaims, running into the room. Ally takes the remote, turning it on. "E! News." Ally puts it on that channel.

"And please welcome, 1/5 of Fifth Harmony, Lauren Jauregui!"

"Hello." Lauren smiles, sitting on the couch next to the interviewer. "How are you?"

"I'm doing great! Now, you said you have something very important to say, what is it?"

I put the tub aside, leaning forward.

"What the hell are you doing, Lauren?" I whisper, starring at the TV.

"I want to apologize, to someone very important to me. Y/N Cabello," Lauren says. My eyes go wide. "I'm sorry for putting you last, and not first. And I have something to say, and please be open minded about this. I'm in love with you, Y/N. I love you so fricken much. I'm gay, yeah, gay. So, please give me another chance?"

~~~

ooh, she came out on national television.

what will you say?

~Gracie, xoxo. :)