Ariana Grande and the Power of Daddy's Credit Card

The Holy Epiphany

It was a sunny day. There were no clouds in the sky. The birds on the trees were singing happily and they'd bow down whenever she drove by with her Maserati. She parked her car, opened the door, and let her Chanel boot-covered leg get out first. Some bystanding insects fainted at the sight of her: the one and only, Ariana Grande.

Ariana was a 16-year-old girl who lived in her Boca Raton, Florida home... well, villa. You'd expect me to say that she was the average high schooler and blah blah blah. Well, no. She was no ordinary girl: she was divine! Every day, Ariana woke up, went to school with her Maserati, ignored all the basic bitches who tried to be nice to her, and skipped classes to stay with her boy, Harry, and her best friend, Selena. In the afternoon, Ariana enjoyed playing the game "drain the card": all she had to do was try to finish her billionaire daddy's money in two hours... needless to say, she always lost! ;-)

From what you've read so far, you might think that Ariana's life is perfect. You might be jealous of her. You might even be wishing you were her. Well, her life wasn't as perfect as her body. Every night, after her daily fingering, she cried herself to sleep. You're probably wondering why. Well, she was tormented by a question: "God, why did you send me to this world where no one can even remotely compare to me?"

One night, unexpectedly, God decided to answer her: "Human beings know that nobody's perfect... but, in order to know the meaning of this word, there has to be someone who's perfect."

Ariana, who had low self-esteem, asked: "Me?"

God answered: "Exactly. The world is full of imperfections. That's why you're here, divine Ariana. You have to find them and make them perfect! Now I have to go, but remember: the biggest imperfections are trying to make you become like them, and they're closer than you think."

Ariana still had so many questions to ask God, but He disappeared before she could say anything. She was left alone, more confused than before, against the imperfections of the world.