A/N: The italics is Cookie having a mental conversation with her conscience, it's a little deeper than Cookie just thinking to herself. You can't hide from your conscience.
Cookie POV
Baby? Please, nigga got me fucked the hell up. Shit, I was just helping out home girl... uh..what that name plate on the desk say? Brenda, Briana or.. hell I don't know.
"Lucious, who's the lady at the desk out there? She sound cool as hell with all that shade she was throwing your Boo Boo thang. Girl funny as hell!" I said waving my hand to the now closed door while laughing a little.
Lucious still looked like he was in shock. What the hell, like I don't call everybody that? Nigga ain't special and shit. ('Let me stop lying to myself', my mind whispered.)
"So baby? Sounds right." Lucious questioned smiling all cute and shit. Ooh Shit, wrong direction, he took all that seriously. ('It was kinda serious though', that know it all mind said.)
"Got her ass gon' didn't it.?. I got something to talk to you about." I said while Lucious smile dropped. I don't know why he's looking sad. He divorced me! While I was on lock down mind you. ( 'Hmhm..', damn brain, that bitch know too much.)
"What you need Cookie?" He asked as he moved behind his desk. I guess I touched on a nerve, he got all businessy quick. ('Bussinessy? What you need them degrees for, hunh?', even my mind knew that was wrong.)
"I do want to know what's happening with our company.." I got out before Lucious stankin' ass cut me off. (NIGGA!, like I ain't talking!, my mind shouted. )
"Our company? You mean my company." He said looking all angry, sounding grumpy and shit. ('Yea, daddy, ours!', my mind screamed.)
"I hope for your sake these walls are sound proof." I said as Lucious held up a finger and pressed a button under his desk.(Hm press it, bitch.!., my mind said.)
"Alright Cookie, what kind of shit you trying to throw at me?" He all business now. (What. The. Fuck?, I wondered)
"What kind of shit you want me to throw because I got nearly twenty years of shit to throw!" I yelled before calming down. ('wait for it..wait for it''. I mentally taunted.) "However, I'm not here for that."I said dusting the imaginary lint off my dress. (Yes, I'm a fucking lady!, I mentally rolled my head.)
Lucious started looking confused, things weren't adding up I guess. (Wait for it...,I thought)
"What you mean twenty? Cookie you did like seventeen, what you pulling?" Lucious smirked as he sat back in his chair.
This mother fucker thinks I don't know about those ho's before and after we got married. I heard what Vernon dumb ass told him that night it first happened. He told Lucious we can't be fucking that much while I was pregnant and Lucious stupid ass believed him. Ugh. Then there's my four hundred grand I saved up and gave him for Empire.
"What? I was slangin' dope back in the day? I don't think anybody really cares anymore" Lucious smiled, the fucker had nerve to smile.(Wait for it.., my mind whispered.)
"Oh no, Lucious.. I gave you four hundred thousand dollars of drug money. All for this, it was our dream, Lucious.!." I cried.(Oh and there's more, image is eveythang nigga!, I mentally smirked.)
After all this time I still believed I was a part of this. My stint in prison was for no reason. Let Lucious tell it, my taking that charge all by myself was for nothing, there never was anything to come home to.(There is really no point now, my mind said.)
"What, you gon' sink my company now? What do you want, Cookie?" Lucious gritted threw his teeth.
I knew I lost the man I loved years ago, I didn't know how bad it was though.(It's bad, it's really , really bad.., my mind softly said.)
"It's that serious Lucious? I just wanted to see how our.. well, your dream came to life. I see now." I said as I got up.
"Wait Cookie, don't go. This got tense and out of hand. I just got defensive. I'm sorry, I've been doing this so long on my own.." He said before dropping that sentence. He didn't have to, I knew where that thought was going.
"You can keep it, Lucious. I wanted to see what I was giving up." I said with with my back to him and tears in my eyes. These damn pregnancy hormones.
"Giving up? What are you talking about, Cookie? What you talking about giving up?" Lucious asked as I walked to the door.
"I don't want it, Lucious. I just wanted to know whatever became of a ghetto dream." I said softly before I walked out the door. (It's over, Cookie.) I should have known it wouldn't be easy, but damn Lucious has changed so much. I don't know what happened to him and I don't know if I even want to fix it myself, Lucious has to figure it out.(Girl, please. you know that ain't true.)
