Shrek and Bellatrix

Progress

The next day, Shrek called Bellatrix
"Hello?" She answered.
"Um- Hi." Shrek said nervously.
"Oh, hey Shrek!"
"Hi Bella..."
"So what's going on?"
"Well, I was wondering, if you-"
"Yes."
"Really?"
"Yes."
"Okay! Where then?"
"The three broomsticks, it's in Diagon Alley in London. Go to the Leaky Cauldron Inn and ask Tom, he'll help you."
"Okay! Meet you there!"
"See ya."
"Bye."
Shrek hung up the telephone. He needed to get ready for his date tonight. He went to his closet and dug through his clothes. Surely there has got to be one decent thing in there.
*time skip brought to you by Draco Malfoy's ferret farm*
Shrek lie on the floor, tears streaming out of his eyes. "I have nothing to wear!" He shrieked. Clothes were scattered around on the floor, none of them meeting Shrek's standards for Bella. "Oh, what should I do?"
A bright light began to stream from Shrek's closet. He sat up and stared. The light was coming from a beautiful purple sweater vest and beige long sleeve shirt. Woah, it's glorious, Shrek thought.
*meanwhile, at the Malfoy Residence*
"Cissy! Where are my dress robes?!" Bellatrix was running around the house, throwing open every door and looking for her dress robes. "I don't know!" Narcissa replied.
Bella threw open the door to Draco's room. He gasped and fell off his armchair. He was clutching a teddy bear with a photo of the Mudblood Granger's face taped to it. "Okaaaay." Bella backed out and slowly closed the door.
She ran to Lucius and Narcissa's room and opened the door. She swelled with anger when she saw Lucius wearing her favorite dress robes. "Lucy! What are you doing!" She snapped. "I- I-" he stammered. She gave him a look of fury. "I feel like a princess when I wear it!" He wailed. "Give me my robes!" She snarled. Lucius sighed. He began to take off the robes. "No no no no no! Wait until I leave!" "Oh, sorry."
Bella stood outside the door. Lucius opened the door a crack and handed her the robes. She went to her room and put them on. Someone knocked on the door. "Come in!" Bella shouted. Narcissa walked in. "Why are you dressed up so fancy?" She asked. Bella turned her head with a smirk on her face. "I have a date." She said. Narcissa gasped. "Really? That's awesome!" She said. "Yeah, and the guy is totally hot." She giggled. "Who is he? Where does he work? What does he look like?" Narcissa pestered. "Goodness, Cissy! This is only our first date!" She said.
Narcissa began charming her hair to make it pretty. "I like my hair how it is Cissy!" Bella groaned. "Nope, you need to be fancy for your date! He'll be impressed!" She said.
Bella laughed. "Okay." She said. Bella left the house smiling. She skipped down the sidewalk and apparated to the Leaky Cauldron.
*lets go back to Shrek*
Shrek walked into the Inn. An old man stood behind the bar, shining a glass. "Hello! How can I help you?" He asked. "Um, I'm looking for Diagon Alley, and I don't know how to get in." Shrek was blushing. Tom chuckled. "Just out back youngun." He pointed to the back door. Shrek thanked the man. He walked outside to see the brick wall. He needed a wand to enter. But he didn't have a wand. Shrek shrugged. He punched down the wall and walked through the hole. Little did he know there was a witch in a bottle green dress watching him through the window of the Leaky Cauldron.
She brushed a blonde curl out of her face. She looked across the table at the man sitting there. "I'm sorry, we'll continue this later." She picked up her quill and parchment and began to walk after the ogre.

Soooooo who's this lady? Find out next chapter! You know her, you hate her, it's Delores Umbridge!

Just kidding.

Bye lovelies! Comment if you think this story is funny!