Death Is My BFF (Book 1 Original Series)

Chapter 1: The Garbage Can Smasher

THIS IS THE LAST EDITED CHAPTER POSTED FOR THE BOOK. Please vote if you enjoyed!! :)

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" Hello, Chicago! Thanks for tuning in to America's #1 news channel. The only news channel that has a happy couple as their Anchor's. I'm Anchorman George Smiley, and with me every single day, 365 days a year and twenty-four hours a day, is my lovely wife, Anchorwoman Lavender Smiley. I hope everyone's having a happy, happy night!"

            The camera panned to a woman in a purple blouse who's bright, fake smile matched her husband's. "As do I, Georgie-poo, as do I." For a moment, her grin faltered as if she had forgotten the camera was on her. "In the latest news, Joe's Sloppy House was closed due to suspected cannibalism, and rodent molestation! Yikes, not again!'

            "Disturbing! Those rats are going to need some intensive therapy this time!" George Smiley chimed in with his phony laugh. "You'd think the dang restaurant would be closed by now, but I must say, their Sloppy Joe's are just to die for!"

            "Very true, George, very true. Back to you, Tom!"

            "The  midnight news never fails to put me to sleep," I mumbled, toweling off my long hair and then throwing myself onto my bed, yawning. Sleep just hadn't been an option for me, even on a Friday night. Ever since school had started about a month ago, my entire sleep cycle was thrown off, and I was left watching the news on the tiny television in my room that I sometimes had to bang a few times to work while my parents slept like the dead.

            I watched through tired eyes as weatherman Tom Farleigh did his best impersonation of rain and wind with his hands over the green screen picture of Chicago and looked like a pissed off Orangutan. Laughing to myself, my eyes slowly started to finally shut when--

            "Breaking news!" Suddenly George Smiley was back on the television and a picture of two handsome men with magnificent hair, pristine navy blue suits, and brilliant white smiles flashed onto the screen. "Devin Star, President of the top advertising company in America, D & S Towers,  and his son, VP of D & S and teen heart-throb, David Star,  were both spotted this afternoon having a dinner date with--"

            I shut off the television. If there was anything I was sick and tired of more than anything, it was seeing those two slime balls on the television, in the newspaper, and on the front of every magazine simply because they owned a successful business and were extremely good looking. Ever since David Star had been contacted by the modeling industry five years before, he had appeared naked with only his hands in front of his privates on the front of Vogue magazine, was featured on Ellen sixteen times, and even starred in a few movies. At the sound of his name, every girl in school's ovaries spontaneously combusted, and I was sick and tired of it. Especially because the media had recently become obsessed with his father, Devin Star, who had too many famous lovers to count and had allegedly been pulled over for drunk driving times any without any sort of punishment.

            My guess was that the officer was a female, or Devin had given the officer an autograph.

            Shaking my head to myself, I tossed the remote onto my nightstand right as I heard a huge bang outside. The noise jolted me into awareness and my eyes shifted to my bedroom window. Honestly, I had almost peed myself, I had been so startled. Was a raccoon getting into the garbage again?

            I threw my head back onto the pillows, groaning as I remembered my father telling me to come out with the bat and scare the critter off if I heard that thing messing with the garbage again.