To My Dearest...

Don't Want to Be

The bidders were all walking back to the hotel, Sakura still in their minds as they did so. Baba and Ota were trying to cheer up the three, but they knew that even they were worried for her as much as the others. 

And although not showing it, Soryu was the one who was most afraid.

It was like... The moment he realized it. The moment Baba had said she might not come back. Everything. Everything came back to him.

All the moments they shared. Their first contact in class as partners. The library. The button. The letter. His love...

He couldn't give up on her now... But she could give up on him any moment.

And it was all his fault.

~*****~

It's been one week. One week since they last visited Sakura and they were back at the hospital. But instead of permission to her room, they were granted a visit to the doctor's office. 

It just wasn't going to end well.

"You're lying!"

Eisuke's shout reverberated in the office, the other 4 quiet as they listened. "I apologize Mr. Ichinomiya, there is just simply nothing more we can do. It's been a month and a half and we're only giving her until the end of the month to wake up, otherwise... It's just going to prolong pain even more."

"But she's alive! You'll be the one's killing her!"

"You are, Mr. Ichinomiya." he replied quietly, shocking the CEO. "She's fighting for her life so desperately, trying to wake up. Are you really going to make her suffer for so long...?"

The brunette fell quiet. Even his power and money couldn't do anything now. It was useless.

"I apologize, but by the end of the month, we'll be taking her off life support. If she wakes up before that or before 12:00 am on the last day, she'll be back with you."

His footsteps tapped and echoed in their ears as he left the bidders to think, saying he had other patients to attend to.

'They're lying...' 'No... It's not true...'

But all their thoughts were pushed back by the little bit of common sense they had now. They were lost.

They had to idea what to do.

~*****~

They all left. But one stayed.

Soryu sat by her bedside as Eisuke pat him on the back once more before leaving with the rest, having to do some work and with Baba and Ota saying they had work to.

The smell of flowers were invading his nose as he glanced around the once bland room, which were filled with balloons, presents and flowers. He looked back once more to the girl lying on the bed, the heart monitor beeping loudly, proving she was still alive.

And hopefully, it was going to stay that way.

He was scared. And he couldn't even deny it.

Why now?

Why did it have to be now? When he remembered everything...

He didn't break promises before. He wasn't going to now. 

~*****~

He walked aimlessly about and around the streets, the sound of snow crunching slightly under his feet. He arrived back at the hotel where are all the other bidders were playing poker, perhaps trying to get their mind off Sakura's current condition.

"Soryu's here! Come join us, Sor!" Ota invites, a bit tipsy. It was only 10:00 and the lounge already smelled of booze and women's perfume. "Soryu!" a group of women crowd around him but he pushes his way out of it and takes a seat next to Baba and Eisuke.

The women sidle up to him and the bidders. Soryu downs a glass of scotch, waiting and watching as Mamoru dealt the cards.

It was a state of peace. For now.

By 1:00 am, the bidders have all passed out except for Soryu, who was now crowded by the rest of the women. They whine as Soryu orders them out, tipsy with his head light from the alcohol. "Get out."

He tumbled back to his suite, leaving all the bidders in the lounge passed out on the floor or couches. Even through the alcohol, he still had a sense of mind left, which brought the photo of Sakura back to his head, making his heart ache painfully.

He collapsed onto his bed, no longer bothering to change his clothes as he only managed to fumble off his shoes, socks and tie. His hair a little disheveled, he sighs.

He switches off the lights and lies in bed under the covers, staring out the window, it's curtains drawn open as the moonlight beams down on him. The city lights glimmer like precious gems, reflecting in his midnight blue hues.

His pained hues filled with tears.

He hated showing weaknesses, and he hasn't cried in a long time. Since he was a kid to be exact. It was absolutely pathetic.

His tears burnt as they rolled down his cheeks, wrapped up in the warm covers of his bed.

"Please, God... Give me one more chance..."

"I don't want to be alone anymore."

~*****~

A/N: I am SO SO SO sorry for the REALLY late update! I've started new stories and there's school to balance and UGH.

I hope you enjoy this chapter and sorry if it's too short, I'll have the next one up in a few or so.

For now, Ciao!

~DarkAngel