I Was, I Am.

-PRESENT V/S PAST-

EDITED CHAPTER#13:

Ma shifted in her sleep as I tugged at her quilt gently, sliding next to her on the bed.

"Aditi...?" she whispered; with surprise.

"Yes."

"What happened?"

It was past midnight, and I just couldn't go to sleep. I had laid in bed; staring at the ceiling; feeling this weird sort of emptiness. And it sucked that every time sleep managed to find me, I got flashes of Aakash.

We were friends; before we were anything else. School, college, festivities; on every occasion I had more than one memory with him. Every corner of my room had history; a history with three people who were the closest things to friends I had ever had.

And though Aakash had ruined everything, I couldn't; and I wouldn't; deny that he was an amazing friend to me.

"Nothing." I whispered back.

"Beta, the last time you came to sleep next to me in the middle of the night was the night before your final CA results would be announced."

I smiled, as the memory resurfaced and I nuzzled my head closer to Ma; feeling this weird warmth that I could only feel when Ma embraced me.

"It's Aakash's farewell tomorrow." I sighed, "He's leaving; Ma."

In the background, Papa snored away to glory; oblivious to my presence and the mother-daughter moment that was taking place. This was typical of him.

I'm pretty sure he still isn't aware of the numerous nights I would sleep next to Ma on their bed back in school.

"He needs to go, Aditi."

"No he doesn't! He could continue his job here and stay with all of us."

The word 'us' hung in the air, as I took in the incorrectness of my declaration.

Disha and Arjun were no longer in Mumbai.

"Now that's double standards, isn't it?Didn't you leave GenEx for your dream?"

I sighed, giving a light nod.

"He's leaving the country for his dream."

"But I love him, Ma." I mumbled rather helplessly, "I've...always loved him."

Ma nodded with understanding. "Okay. But what does that have to do with him leaving?"

I shrugged with exasperation, "I need to see him!"

"I see." Ma replied thoughtfully.

She gently ran her hands through my hair, untangling it ever so lightly as she continued,

"He loves you too. But love doesn't need you to give up on your dreams."

"He doesn't love me, Ma." I shook my head with conviction.

"And what makes you say that?" her voice was soft, and the warmth it radiated made my eyes droop with fatigue.

"I mean, he's never tried to tell me." I replied, fighting the sleep.

She laughed softly; and I couldn't understand how my declaration was amusing to her.

"I'm serious, Ma. He has never told me or even tried to express his love. Everytime I've broached the subject he's found a way to digress from it and repeat how much he cares for me. That certainly doesn't qualify for the kind of love that I feel for him. How can you be so sure?"