N♂RMAL

05 | Homesick

I cut into a fluffy slice of Trench toast, stomach pinching in excitement. I brought the slice up to my mouth and smiled in enjoyment. Mom chuckled at me and began eating her own plate of berry pancakes.

"I told him," I mumbled around some food.

"How'd that go?" she asked, worry creasing her brow. She even lowered her fork back down to pay better attention to me.

"Better than I thought it would go. He even let me give him a hug."

She smiled at me, seeming just as relieved as me. I gave her a shy grin back.

"I'm glad to hear that, baby. I think you two are going to get along great."

"I hope so. He seemed really nice."

We made small talk about stuff while hurrying through breakfast since I had a class at ten. We were just trying to enjoy the other's company for as long as we possibly could before parting. On the way back to campus, I held her hand again. I could feel tears welling in my eyes. I didn't want to say goodbye yet. To be honest, I don't think I would ever be ready to say goodbye. Why did I have to choose a school so far away from home?

We sat in silence in one of the lots near my class' building. I sniffled and reached across to give her a suffocating hug. She, in returned, squeezed just as much air out of me.

"You be good, okay?" she said in a thick voice. "I'm only three hours away if you ever need something. Even if it's just to get away from a weekend. I'll come and pick you up, and we'll play with Skye all weekend, okay?"

I chuckled through my tears, and if it was even possible, I squeezed her tighter.

"You too. Don't overwork yourself, and make sure you remember to feed Skye. She needs to be played with every day."

"I'll make sure to do that."

"I promise to call every week. If not, more."

We held each other for a while longer, and I think I cried more than was socially acceptable for a college student on their first day of school. After a while, it set in that I should probably go to class. It was so difficult to part with my mom. She had been the only constant in my life. She was my best friend. She was my everything.

I sniffled and smiled weakly at her. She laughed and wiped the tears from beneath my eye with her fingers.

"Look at you. You've always been a messy crier."

I chuckled and grasped at her hand, shaking it gently. I could tell from the tone of her voice that she was just worrying about me, wondering if I would really be okay by myself. My gesture was supposed to tell her that I would be alright.

At least, that's what I was trying to tell myself.

"I love you, baby."

"I love you too, Mom."

She kissed our intertwined fingers and urged me out of the car, reminding myself once again that I had classes. I nodded and stepped out. She pulled away slowly with a smile wave. I mimicked the action and felt the tears stinging at my eyes again.

I missed her already.

***

"How do you do it?" I asked.

I was currently sitting on my bed in my pajamas, a light blanket wrapped around me. It was still summer, but I needed the comfort. Our window was open, letting the cool summer night wind flow into our room. My eyes were still feeling puffy from all my crying I did earlier. It was only the third day of the semester, and I was absolutely, horrendously, and extremely homesick.