Its in Your Head || ???
Words: 1340
You woke up in the middle of the night. Youre sweating, you feel sick to your stomach, and the nightmare you just had lingers in your head.
You pick up your phone, and type something out, to send to your closest friend. Theyd get it right..?
Your head flips. You begin to think, that they probably wont care. Youre just bugging them from their precioud sleep. They need it, you know! You shakily erase the message, and put down your phone, and stare up at the ceiling.
Its dark. You really hate the dark. The only light in the room spills through the room is from the moon- you saw something glistening in the moonlight, and you saw what it was. It was your old toy when you were little. You get up, and shove it in your hoodie pocket, and look out the window.
The moon is bright in the sky, but going down and you can see the bleak light of dawn. Today was sunday. You let out a breath of small happiness, knowing that school wasnt gonna be here for another day.
Another thought came into your mind, a sickening one at that. You wished you had someone to hang out with, because your friend was busy this weekend.
But at the same time, maybe the solitude was good. You didnt want to be mean and be tired of them. You cant help getting tired though, its just your nature.
The moon was soon over powered by the lighter blue skies of the morning. You lay your head on the window seal, and you pull the toy out of your pocket. You tear up looking at it, and you fling it at the bed, hitting its target softly. You hang your head as tears drip down your face, and hiccupped quietly. You wanted to reach out to someone, but you couldnt. Their problems were way more important that yours. You only wish people could care more about you.
You cant reach out to your parents. They do feed you, but its conditional. You were locked in your room, you screwed up on friday. They didnt take your phone, because they knew you knew better than to mess with them. And plus, this was normal, right?
You cant reach out to the few friends you have. You cant let them worry about you. You love them so much and you cant afford them to care about you. They have their own problems, and you need to be there for them.
So here you sat, sobbing alone, with your spiralling mind breaking itself into pieces.
Is this what you wanted?
.___.
You heard someone quietly calling your name. You lifted your head, dried tears soaking your face, and your neck pain was excruciating, the bright light of the afternoon sun didnt help. You hissed, and pulled down the blind, but only enough to see, you stood groggily, as you looked over. In your closet was the normal things. You saw your shoes, that person, you went ahead walking forward until your mind processed what it had saw.
You turned back to see the person right behind you, and you let out a scream, kicking, but feet being met with air.
"Shhhh, sweetheart.." The person stroked your face, and it felt like wisps. You choke down a sob. This was it, wasnt it? You kicked, crying, tears spilling down face. The person kept trying to console you, and they finally grabbed onto your shoulders, even though it felt like a distant feeling. They snapped your name out, and you snapped to attention. Only your parents said it in such a manner, when you had done something wrong. You wanted to cry again. How did they get into the room?
"Darling, its fine.." The person realized their mistake, and stroked your hair. You were confused. Was this person a good person?
"Wh-who are you..?" The words spilled out of your mouth, like you had never spoken before.
"That isnt important. But, if you would, you need to calm down. Just take deep breaths." They said, and you take their advice. You took deep, shaky breaths, and let them out quickly. The person demonstrated a technique. They placed their hands on their chest, and said, "breath in for 5 seconds, hold for 2, and let it out for 5 seconds." They did the motion as you mimicked, and your breath slowly went back to normal, your heart still pounding, but it was getting better.
"Is that any better?" The voice distantly said, and you nodded an equally distant nod. You finally locked eyes on the person. The light that still spilled through allowed you to see their features. They had brown hair, and brown eyes, and their clothes were plain. The person however looked like a mirage. "Are you.." You muttered. The voice nodded and you covered your mouth.
"N-no.. Youre dead.." You whispered, and they just sighed. "Listen young one." They said. "What happened those few years ago wasnt your fault, okay?"
"B-but it is! I-I killed you-" the words scratch out of your throat, before the mirage quietened you. "Shhh... You dont deserve all of this crap you go through." The sentence was muttered, you supposed to be unheard, but it was heard loudly. You couldnt help to respond, "Yes I do.."
"You really dont. Youre amazing. I was wrecklessly driving, and frankly i shouldnt have been driving. We were way too young-"
You cried out your twins name, and grabbed onto the air where they were. "Why are you gone? Why am I stuck here? I dont wanna be here!" You cried out frantically. Your brother hugged back, and the first time that whole year, you felt partially happy.
"I miss you too... But listen.. You need to move on."
"Wh-what?" You scrambled to get the words out. "I cant!" You screamed. Your brother looked at you warmly but sternly.
"You are a beautiful young lady." You was confused. Your clothes hung loosely on you as starvation was clinging to you, and cuts were strayed on your arms. Your hair was cut hap hazardly, and bruises covered your body. "You have so much potential.. You can do so much with your life." Your brother said softly, and you looked down. "Youre so important to a lot of people. Dont waste the light you have." You smiled slightly.
"I love you so much, and I'll always be right here, watching over you. Please dont beat yourself up. I care about you so so so much, and so does a lot of people. Dont give up." He hugged you, and you loosely hugged back. Maybe he was right. In the fading light of the day, the light from the brightest sun there would ever be rose.
"Youre so beautiful." She heard echos of voices. She could pick up a quiet beeping noise, and your brother looked teary eyed at you. "You can make it through this... But if you would, I think you should sleep.. Okay?" He said, willing his voice not to crack. You smiled weakly. "Whatever you wish.. Okay?" You meekly got onto the bed, and he tucked you in, but got into the bed with you, like he always would, and snuggled with you.
You drifted off into a peaceful sleep, and tears streaked down his face as the world faded to dust, taking him with it.
He always knew you had a bright future.
.___.
You woke up, attached to machines. You slightly remembered the dream you had, like a lingering nightmare.
Your twins words echoed in your head.
You smiled. And then heard screams of excitement. "Theyre awake!" You heard the eager voices of your parents. For some reason, you felt untrusting of your parents, but once you saw their crying expressions, you shook it off.
You were happy.
And thats all that mattered to him.
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This was all over the place. Try to guess the meaning, tho c:
