Before the Dawn

Chapter Seventeen

Days pass as I re-emerge myself into life at the Academy.  I make no progress in my quest to defeat Theo and I begin to believe more and more that the whole idea is hopeless. My constant heartache does nothing to lift my spirits. My heart aches for my Warrior every second of every day. This is the longest we've been apart since we found each other in this lifetime. I have to fight my heart's longing to pick up the phone and beg him to come to me. I resist these instincts to find him, but I know that I won't be able to continue like this for long. He hasn't made an appearance at the Academy yet, but it's only a matter of time.

Now, as I sit staring out of the window at the setting sun, I recall the feel of Declan's strong arms around me; his hands caressing my skin. I recall how, in those precious moments spent wrapped in each other's embrace, Declan would gaze down at me with tender green eyes filled with love and adoration. I smile softly to myself and press a gentle hand to my heart- a heart that beats for only my dark god.

When this is all over, I promise to myself, I'll spend the rest of eternity in his arms and never let him go. That is, if I survive this.

A  quiet knock on the door breaks me from my reverie. "Laila?" a timid voice asks. I sigh and reluctantly turn from the window.

"Come in, Amora," I say with a roll of my eyes.

The door opens quickly and in comes Amora with a black garment bag hung from her arm. As she walks in, I note that her hair is curled and she looks as if she'd taken great consideration to what she decided to wear. This brings a pleased smile to my lips. When she'd first discovered Aphrodite's death, she'd given up on everything for the days following. It'd taken a lot of coaxing from myself and Egan to get her to become some-what herself again. She's different, though. It's like she's finally grasped that this is really happening and it's not just some sick dream.

"You know you don't have to knock," I say lightly as she closes the door. "It's your room, too."

Amora just shrugs lightly and beckons me over to her bed. Pushing off of the window ledge, I go sit on the edge of her bed, eyeing the bag warily.

 "What's this?"

Amora's eyes twinkle mischievously; a look I'd missed greatly. "Oh, this?" she asks in a falsely innocent voice. "It's your full moon circle dress."

I frown at her. "But our dresses are in the closet," I  argue, thinking of the Grecian style dress I'd worn to my first full moon ritual.

Amora shakes her head at me in amusement, obviously seeing something that I'm not.

"Do you honestly think that the Leaders are going to let a goddess such as yourself wear the same thing as us mere mortals? Please," she says like the idea is totally unfathomable.

What's so wrong about me blending in? It seems like everybody except myself is against the idea. I don't want to be the center of attention. I never have. It's bad enough that I'm going to be the only goddess at the circle and now they're going to dress me up to make me stand out even more? No, thank you. Death doesn't stand in the spotlight. It hides in wait in the shadows.

Seeing my frightened look, Amora goes on quickly to explain. "I talked them into letting me design it. The job was just what I needed to help me get my mind off of what happened to Aphrodite," Her face falls for a moment, then perks up. "Don't worry, it's classy but with a flair that adds just a hint of sex appeal. You'll love it."

Still afraid, but not wanting to disappoint her after all the work she'd done, I motion for her to unzip the bag. She squeals in excitement and does just that.

Inside the bag, I see a mass of white cloth and diamonds. I run my hand over the soft material and am immediately reminded of the beautiful white gowns that I wore in the Underworld. Then, realizing where my thoughts are going, I quickly re-focus my attention on Amora, who's shoving the garment bag into my arms and telling me to change.

Obediently, I follow her commands, seeing no reason to fight her on it. This makes her happy- an emotion that she hasn't had for days- and I'm not about to ruin that. I step into the bathroom, shutting the door behind me softly as I hand the bag on a hook. In one swift motion, I unzip the bag and expose the soft white material that hides within it. As I take the gown off of its hanger, I begin to feel the familiar thrumming of excitement in my chest.

Surprised, I realize that I'm actually excited to see what my best friend designed for me. Beyond that, I'm actually looking forward to what tonight has in store for me. I've been stuck in a rut ever since I left my Warrior and I can't seem to get out. I know that this won't fix me but it'll help, right?

Smiling, I slip on the dress, relishing the feel of the soft material against my skin. After that, I put on the jewels over dress that lies on the white material like a second dress; one made of diamonds. Once I'm content that I've put it on right, I turn to give myself a once over in the mirror.

A small gasp leaves my parted lips. That couldn't be me in the mirror, could it? I shake my head in wonder. She made me look like a goddess, I think proudly.

The dress is exactly like Amora said it would be; classy with just a dash of sex appeal. It's strapless with a sweetheart neckline and daring slits in it just below the bust on either side. It falls to the ground delicately, flowing like a gentle stream over my body. The diamond over dress curls over the tops of my arms and reaches down just below my hips, creating an almost unearthly atmosphere that radiates from every stitch of the dress.

Declan would love this, I think bittersweetly. The thought tears my heart apart.

I will fix this. I will make it safe for Declan to love me. I will mend my broken heart.

Taking a deep breath, I open the door and walk out before I lose my courage.

Amora looks up as I enter, but, before she can speak, I rush over and pull her into an embrace. She doesn't hesitate to return the hug whole heartedly.

"Thank you," I whisper, "for everything."

Amora pulls away and smiles. Without a word she gently pushes me down onto the edge of her bed and begins to do my hair. When she finishes, and the small tugs on my hair ceases, she places a small tiara onto my head and grins. "Perfect."

She disappears into the bathroom then to ready herself for the full moon circle. I take her temporary absence to stand up from the bed to walk over to the window. I stare up at the night sky and let a single tear fall; a tear for my aching heart, for my hopelessness and for my fears. Then I turn away. Now is a time to be strong and strong I will be.