Make This a Long Goodbye

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"You remembered" I asked him. Avi flashed me that million dollar smile. I looked down again and saw the lotus flower hair clip that I had the day our friends sent us on our "date". The tiny crystals at the bottom has a warm glow with the candles glowing around us. Avi took it and placed it my now straitened hair.

"Thank you. I love it. I love all of this" I told him trying to hold back tears.

"One more thing" Avi told me. He then turned around and revealed a pizza box from the same place we went to the night we started dating. "Plus, I got ranch dressing" he added.

"I will never understand your fascination with ranch and pizza" I teased.

"Don't knock it until you try it" he laughed. The two of us stayed up all night laughing and talking. I really was incredibly lucky to have someone like this in my life. Although this was truly something out of a fairy tale, we both knew the truth. Whether we wanted to talk about it, or not, this would be over soon. Soon, we would be constricted to calls and text. I know I at least had that, but it just wouldn't be the same as what we had become accustomed to. I had grown spoiled from his kiss and his touch. I knew this to be truth, but at the same time, I just wanted to enjoy what was happening right then and there.

The next morning, I woke up in Avi's arms. We were still on the rooftop and he was still asleep. The sun was still rising and the candles had burned out as if they had decided to let the sun take over.

"Why does this have to be over" I thought to myself. I looked back and saw Avi sleeping and I thought of how amazing my time with him has been. I pushed a strand of hair that was out behind his ear. I always thought the greatest gift I ever received was my ability and love for dance. It was etched across my heart for 24 years. Then, I look at him and realize that maybe I've received an even greater one.

"I'm really gonna miss this" I heard a groggy Avi say. His eyes were still closed but he said it with a smile. I looked at him. "Good morning" he said wiping his eye. I waited before I said anything.

"Looks like we fell asleep." I said just before yawning.

"Wow" he said looking at me.

"What" I asked chuckling.

"You're even more beautiful when you first wake up" he said with a smile. I blushed a little.

"In all this time, I've never known you to be a liar." I said with a smirk. We both laughed but mine was short lived. "Avi, What's going to happen when reality sets in again" I asked quietly. He put his arm around me and pulled me close.

"You are my reality" he said. " I'll call, text, Skype, I'll even send a carrier pigeon if I have to" he assured me. I looked up to him. I thought I would say it. For that split second, I thought I might say the words that had been burning inside of me but were too afraid to release themselves. Instead, he placed a kiss on my forehead. We watched the rest of the sunrise together in silence. The warm, pale, orange glow on the horizon was so calming. I placed my head on Avi's shoulder and he leaned towards me. I could stay like this forever.

Unfortunately, the day had come a little faster than I wanted.

"Take care of yourself girl" said Mitch.

"We'll be back before you know it" Kirstie assured me. I said all my goodbyes and given all of my hugs. Everyone had already left to board the plain. All but Avi who had his hands in his pockets. We were both silent.

"Let's not say goodbye" I finally said.

"Because 'Goodbye' means forever" he added.

"Neither one of us wants that" I finished. We pressed lips after those words.

"See ya later alligator" he said and I slightly smiled.

"In a while crocodile" I replied. He placed a kiss on my cheek before turning away. I could only watch as he walked through the gate to board. I saw him stop and look back. I waved one last time.

"I love you" he mouthed.

"I love you more" I mouthed back as a single tear ran down my face. I could see that perfect smile that I loved.

A week had passed and Avi kept his promise. The two of us were in constant contact. I had just gotten off the phone with him when I wanted to stretch my legs and take a walk in the hallway. I turned a corner when I bumped into a Jack sized road block.

"I really need to pay more attention in these hallways" I said gathering myself.

"You really ought to watch where you're going" he said. I rolled my eyes and tried to get around him. He stepped in front of me. "did you finally lose that gaurd dog of yours" he asked.

"He has a name and he's not my guard dog" I corrected. "When a good boyfriend sees his girlfriend is in trouble, he tends to act on it" I let slip. I did a subtle sweep of the hallway to make sure no one was listening to that.

"Oh. He's your boyfriend now" he asked condescendingly.

"Keep your voice down" I barked.

"Relax. I'll keep your little secret" he paused. "For a price" he whispered. My eye grew a little wide

"Is this your way of flirting" I asked irritated. "Little tip: it's not working" I said.

"It worked sophomore year" he said slyly.

"Shut up" I said almost yelling at him. A few people walking by stopped to stare for a few seconds. I blushed a little. "We don't talk about that" I said quietly after people stopped looking at us and kept walking. Jack smirked.

"Calm down baby. I was only teasing" he said. "You're a little more defensive these days" he pointed out. "Is it because of the 'boyfriend' " he asked with air quotes.

"Even if it is, I hardly see how that would be any business of yours" I stated.

"It's okay. I won't say anything. I know the truth, but does he" he asked that last part in my ear. As he walked away, I could feel my skin begin to crawl and stomach begin to churn. I shoved my hands into my pockets and kept walking. He really pissed me off sometimes. He had no right to speak to me like that. Although, With that last sentence, Jack had managed to place a mental ball and chain around my ankle. The worst part about it was that Jack had a point. I knew Avi wasn't Jack's biggest fan. I would say he just didn't like him. Granted it was with good reason and I understood why. I knew I had several chances to tell him and I hated that I ignored all of them. What would happen if I did? How would he react? Could he even look at me the same? The kind of distaste he had for Jack made all of those questions very open ended.

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