Bleach: The Captain, Toshiro Hitsugaya x OC

Chapter 13: Jinzen

I stood at the gateway to the academy, willing my body to move. It had been a week since the event occurred and I couldn't bring myself to go back to the academy. I know my brother would have wanted me to move on with my life, but I fought a constant battle with my head and my heart. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

As I walked through the halls, I felt more like a ghost than anything. No one bothered to look my way, no one stopped to offer their condolences or ask how I was doing. Life had moved on at the academy. I had to move on.

I opened the door to my classroom. A wide open area of solid wood floors occupied the space. Curtains were drawn closed to keep the sun out and several lanterns had been placed on the floor in random areas, giving the room a soft glow. The heady smell of sandalwood filled my senses, instantly relaxing my body and calming my troubled mind.

Students were dispersed around the room, talking amongst themselves. In the corner of the room I found familiar shinigami leaning against a wall, smiling at me.

"Shuhei!"I waved cheerfully.

He pushed off the wall and embraced me in a hug. "I thought you weren't coming back," he held me at arms length, reassuring himself that I was actually there. "Do you plan to come back to the academy?" He asked.

I instantly regretted skipping out for a week, talking to another being, and not just myself, was a breath of fresh air. "I'm sorry that I haven't kept in touch. Its been a long week and it took me awhile to process everything. But don't worry though, I'm not going anywheres," I reassured him.

"You better not, I promised your brother I'd take care of you. Don't disappear like that again, okay?" He frowned.

My stomach tied into an uncomfortable knot. "I really am sorry, Shuhei. But let's not bring him up right now, okay? It's too much." I fidgeted with the hem of my red uniform.

"Right. I'm sorry, I'm just pissed off that he did himself in. That's the most selfish way to go." He cursed under his breath. I felt a pang of sadness. So that's how they described it in the report, I thought. 

I put my hand on his chest. "No more please. I'm asking you nicely, as a friend."

"Alright," he said, putting his hands up in defeat. "But if you ever want to talk or maybe punch a wall or something, I'm here."

I offered him a weak smile. I decided to change the subject. "So we're practicing jinzen today, huh?" I jerked my thumb at the setup in the room.

"You bet!" He rubbed his hands together with glee. "So is today going to be the day you learn your zanpakutos name?"

"Probably not," I sighed. "I think I'm the only person in the class who hasn't been able to yet."

Jinzen was the practice of holding a meditative state. In this state, we could access a dream world deep within our minds, where the true form of our zanpakuto exists. The first step to becoming a true soul reaper was to learn the name of our zanpakuto. By learning their name, we could access the first form of our ability, our shikai. The second form of our zanpakuto is called our bankai. If we wished to supersede our fellow officers, we had to train with our zanpakutos individually after we graduated from the academy. For most shinigami, it could take up to twenty years to learn this ability.

All seated officers in the thirteen court guard squad have the ability to call on their zanpakutos power by calling their name. We were taught at the beginning of our training that our zanpakuto was just another form of our soul and through combat and meditation we could develop the ability to harmonize with it, becoming a synergistic unit. Shuhei had recently learned the name of his zanpakuto, Kazeshini, and I had to admit it made me jealous. When he awoke from his meditation his body was a bloody mess. Zanpakutos didn't give up their names easily.