Fools

ABCs of love

A
affability, n.: could you tell me if you also feel these randomly undesignated thoughts whenever we're in some space of close proximity?
arbitrary, adj.: as against all the perils of human life, i eventually reckon these signs of compliance proved me wrong about the reason why we're through.

B
bogus, adj.: i knew from the start—i should've not trusted my intuition; but it left my heart nothing but another semblance of hurt.

C
cave, v.: would've you left a scar?

D
demise, n.: how could you be so far?
despite, prep/n.: fret not to scoff, we're no what we used to start.

E
encroach, v.: i lie. i cheat. i commit mistakes. but it doesn't necessarily mean that i could never revert myself back to what i was.
expat, n.: like you, i am just another human.

F
façade, n.: i bleed. i cry. i have feelings. sorry, i didn't know this innocence would bring me unto your endless melees, let alone your daggeresque pleas.

G
grueling, adj.: i'm clingy. i depend. i carry out commensal acts. and it doesn't define me being lone and tempest-tossed.

H
hindsight, n.: i break. i shatter. i smash into smithereens. it occurred to me again, my greatest should-have-been.

I
introspectively, adv.: i tried to find ways on keeping myself busy. i write verses. i watch flicks. i read books with genre of sorts. doing as in everything just to make yet another tick of the clock go. and i can't resist the itch: i still long for your zest on making me all self-composed. turns out, there's no way i could put myself into peace way more than you could.

J
juggernaut, n.: it always makes me hesitant loving you—a never-ending risk of awakening the force that bombards me on all sides.

K
kindred, adj.: i don't want a he. i don't want a she, nary a him or her. you know how much i loathe presuming distinctions. what i want is a we, a humbled combination of they, a strong union of us—against all odds, across all bars.
kismet, n.: but i was misled by my wishful thinking leaving everything up to what's about to happen—that perhaps we'd just end up dreaming or being in one of those reveries, that we are just victims of an ill-fated path.

L
lacuna, n.:

M
misnomer, n.: haven't you realized how petty our relationship had ended?

N
nay, adv.: after every attempt on preventing myself in the very idea of you, i don't even get how it's still you.
nosy, adj.: i've been lost and haven't been found, until your name started again to resonate in me—guiding and urging me to know you more.

O
obverse, adj/n.: my internal compass must be very dilapidated—i've been struggling to find the right person but its needle keeps pointing your direction.

P
phew, exclam.: i'm relieved but what is this part of me that continually misses you?
pine, v.: to which i figured as soon as i can't stay on my seat without our productive chitchats and all, i actually never cease thinking where you might be ever since.

Q
quash, v.: if only feelings could be subjected null and void at some point.

R
rickety, adj.: "what we could predict is that everything is unpredictable," her final words said. i swear it left me contemplating about everything, every moment we've shared if i erred something on my part. she intercepted me from doing so saying, "there's actually none. you've done great. you've done enough. it's just—i don't know where this is going." right then, i realized how everything came into play that easy; thinking every moment that actually happened just appeared to be a dead-on illusion. but even so, i still don't get how after all you seem like my sweetest what if.

S
sine qua non, n.: i just hope for nothing this time but for you to ponder on what i've done and what i'm currently doing. i transcend my highest hopes you could see them as a fraction of how i care for you, of how i care to believe we could still relive this love we deemed undying. if only you had just joined me putting it back, perhaps we've already got what's rightfully ours.

T
taciturn, adj.: after this series of tragedy, i found myself clasping my folded legs in one of those corners, maintaining adherence for what would happen next.
time, n.: never had i realized i have had countless, sleepless nights just thinking of the best thing i could reward myself and at least for this relationship.
trepidation, n.: maybe all good things were really, duly reserved to happen ahead of us.

U
ugh, exclam.: i wish you knew what i felt when you're finally not by my side but in someone else's.
undermine, v.: when things got awry or when i feel the world conspired against me, remember, i won't ever feel embarrassed—whether they're all done in stealth, as long as they're all because of you.
uxorial, adj.: above all of those unlikely happenstances our so-called relationship has undergone, you seemed loyal though the strings between us still aren't intact—never doubt, you're a wife material. and i can't help myself but think you really act like one.

V
velleity, n.: and i quote, "we're actually worth the underwire; all we need is a little push."
vicissitude, n.: maybe you'll never be the one i'm pertaining betwixt my poems' somedays, what-ifs and whatnots. maybe i'll never be the one in thirst for your love. because, in time, i know we could be some and we could be more. we could be some more.

W
why, adv/ conj.: now tell me.
write off, v.: how come the picturesque us now share a ruin in the course of being whole?

X
xanthosis, n.: throw that time i misspelled just the first letter and you don't forget to bring it up from time to time—it starts with an X. nothing different with the way you point out my flaws in lieu of everything i could possibly provide.

Y
yawn, v.: nonetheless, i must say it's tiresome to actually wait, especially for nothing and something unlikely. it winds me up in the worst of times offering myself nothing but pity—a sneak-peek of the extent my love could actually sacrifice.

Z
z, n.: 37 words later, i finally transcribed this love abridged. in these series of terms and breakdowns of forms, i hope for nothing but to end up as your last and be as yours—my endless relapse of course.