Touch of a Hand

Chapter 13 - I like you

Sitting on the bed in Harry's hotel room i felt a weird, confused, anxious.

Harry's question was eating me up, do i go? Leave this city? Join a man that i have just met and go on tour with people i hardly know? Open my life up into the 1D fandom?  Lose the majority of my privacy?

If i don't say yes now will Harry just forget about me? Will the one person i've ever felt safe and loved with leave me? It's not like Harry has a shortage of girls who want to be with him. If i don't go with him now can i ever go on tour with him?

This morning i was so close to just saying yes to Harry but the anxiety of it all was making me feel sick. I'm not one to be spontaneous, i like a plan. And I'm awful at decision making... awful.  I can get so worked up over a simple or complex question. Just choosing what to eat at a restaurant can trigger me to have a breakdown. I'd say i am an overthinking freak.

I remember famously crying in Lower School over a library book. I must have been about 5 years old. We were in the tiny school library on our scheduled library day. We could chose one book to take out for the week. I was stuck between the books 'Topsy and Tim go Swimming' or 'Topsy and Tim go to the Dentist.' I just couldn't decide, everyone had chosen their books and were waiting to leave. My teacher, Mrs Diggery, was pestering me on deciding. She kept hurrying me and i was getting more and more worked up over what book to chose. It must've been the 7th time Mrs Diggery asked me to hurry up and i just broke down in tears.. over a book! I was really embarrassed and remember Mrs Diggery sending every out the library and allowed me to take both of the books out as a treat. My classmates took the milky out of me for the next few days.

Most recently i recall crying over the decision to go out or not with a group of friends. Well they weren't all my friends, my two best friends from home were having a joint halloween party and i couldn't decide if i wanted to go or not. I mean i only knew two of them. If i went i would have to socialise with strangers. The decision led me to tears.

I was watching Harry pack his final bits of clothing into his huge suitcase. The BBC news was playing in the background.  I could still go, i could just say yes now. My brain was working at a million miles an hour, i could feel the tears welling up. 'Don't cry, don't cry'  i was telling myself, 'don't embarrass yourself.' Harry zipped his suitcase up and rolled it over and stood it next to the door along with about 4 other smaller rucksacks.

"That there is basically all my possessions." He joked turning towards me. "You okay?" He asked with a concerned tone, crawling up behind me and lying next to me, his head in his hands. I took a deep breath and strained my eyes open to avoid the tears flowing down my face. 'Stop being silly' i told myself.      

"Yeah, i'm fine. How are you?" I asked avoiding his captivating green eyes.

"I'm fine thanks and i'm also not lying when i say it so, whats wrong?" He asks me.

I brought my hand up to wipe my eyes, "It's stupid." I told him. He sat up and turned my head to face his.

"I don't care, it's upsetting you which bothers me."

"Idon'tknowifishouldgoornot." I spluttered out. I think he understood me. "If i go I'm scared because i have to be around new people, i have to leave everything here, potentially lose all my privacy and we've only just really met. It not that i don't like you or anything its just that i don't want to rush things, i don't want to ruin what we've got but if i don't go I'm scared that i'll.." i stopped myself. I can't tell him I'm scared of losing him, i may come across as obsessive or patronising.

"Scared that you'll?" Harry asked, he had taken both of his hands and put them one on each of my thighs in a gentle, comforting way.

"Scaredoflosingyou." I muttered, praying he understood what i said since i don't think i could say it again. "I probably sound obsessed. I know we've only known each other for a few days."

"Stop" Harry inturrupted me. "You don't sound obsessed, you sound human." He said. "I understand if you don't want to come, i'm not going to force you to come with me." He almost laughed. " You can join me anytime you want."

"Are you sure?" I asked.

"Yes, you're not going to lose me. I like you, really like you." He said, getting closer and closer to my face.  wasn't sure wether to move or just sit there.

Suddenly he jolted his face forward, flinging one hand behind my neck and one behind my back to ensure i didn't fall. His soft rosy,smooth,  warm lips connected with mine with more passion then i've ever experienced before. He slowly laid me back onto the bed and he climbed on top of me, with our lips breaking apart briefly for air. I put my hands in his hair  as the kissing grew deeper. I didn't want this to end, i also didn't want this to go too far, i was not ready for that yet.

A knocking sound came from the door, caching my attention. I disconnect my lips from Harrys and slanted my head almost expecting someone to be standing thee just staring at Harry on top of me. Of course there wasn't, the door was locked. Harry took one of his ads and gently turned my face to him again.

"Ignore it" He mumbled as he reconnected our lips yet again. But the knocks sounded again, a bit more urgent this time.

"Harry, go and answer it, it must be time for you to go." I told him trying to escape his firm grip.

"I don't want to" He complained, pouting like a 5 year old.

"I don't want you to either but you need to go, I'm not going to allow myself to be the reason that you and the other boys are late for your tour.

"They can wait" He butted in.

The knocking grew louder. Along with a deep voice saying "Come on Harry." I had no clue who it was. Harry grumbled and it up, he headed towards his bags as i gathered myself after that hot make out session. He quickly stopped in the mirror to put his hair up into a man bun, he looked hot as hell. I couldn't help but star as his arm muscles contracted as he picked up his rucksacks.

"Arroyo going to sit there and gawp or..." H asked with a little cheeky grin on his face.

"Yes, yes. Leave me alone," I said embarrassingly. i got up off the bed, slipped my shoes on and grabbed my bag. I also tried to let Harry let me carry one of his bags which he refused. He insisted that the man outside his door would help, which of course he was right. When he opened the door a very muscular, Dench man stood outside. He was a bit smaller than Harry and Harry informed me that his name was Mark. He was the band's personal trainer.

"Hi im Mark, you must be..."

"Elise," I finished. "Harry's friend."

"Ah yes of course, Harry's friend. I've heard about you." He said picking the two remaining bags of Harry's. I look of fear must have taken over my face when he said he knew of me because Mark soon assured me 'it's all good stuff' he's heard, thank god.  "Well come on then, we have a bus to catch." Mark cheered. He seemed like a very jolly, happy man. Mark lead the way to the buses. I followed behind him and Harry was behind me. We reached the elevators and they were tiny. All 3 of us wouldn't have fit in so Mark went in one on his own leaving me and Harry to get another lift down.

"I like him" I told Harry as we entered our lift down to the buses.

He smiled.

"I like you" He grinned pecking me on the forehead.

"I like you too." I said back lifting myself onto my tiptoes and kissing him on the lips.

A/N Please comment your thoughts on the chapter below, sorry for keeping you all waiting for a new chapter, i had a break from writing but i will hopefully be more frequent from now on! :) x